


The Lady McCree - Original

by shotahime



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Forced Marriage, Loss of Virginity, Stockholm Syndrome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-16
Updated: 2019-04-09
Packaged: 2019-11-19 02:12:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 11
Words: 41,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18129596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shotahime/pseuds/shotahime
Summary: Original story for The Lady McCree.To detain with your father’s debt, an understanding between you and Jesse McCree was made





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> one word. yikes.  
> totally not proud of this but it helped me get back into writing so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
> oh yeah ps this was written before Ashe was revealed so it can only go downhill from here, baby.

I woke up.

My breath short with pants as I tried to repose myself and keep it together.

My eyes trailed to the windows as it was still dark, but there was a glint of light that started to fill the room. I hopped out of my bed as my bare feet touched the cold wooden floors, not minding the shivers knowing that this would be the last time I would stand in my own bedroom after today that would happen in a matter of a few hours.

Grabbing my knitted cardigan, I slung it on as I made my way out of the backdoor and slipped into my working boots. I trudged my way into the prairie, not far from my backwater home to the only place that I knew I would miss the most.

Climbing over the fence, my feet landed on soft soil and the tall grass grazed my long nightgown slightly as I made through until I reached the middle of the prairie and take in the scent, the softness of the tall grass and how they feel against the palm of my hands, the cold wind that blows in the dawn of day. I take my time as I wanted to before I couldn’t experience this kind of freedom anymore, the same thought keeps haunting my mind for every second that I breathe.

I bent down and grabbed a dandelion, held it tight in my hands and closed my eyes as I silently made a wish, my last wish for the remaining moments of my freedom.

_One day, I would be here again._

But when? Obviously not very soon, maybe time ahead and I would even risk my life for it.

I curled my lips open, and softly blew on the dandelion as its dried petals flew along with the wind. I watched as the wind takes it higher, until it blurs out of my sight and I dropped its stem back onto the ground. The sun started to hoist up higher in the sky, as the surrounding area became very more visible than when I came out here. Before I made my way back home, I heard rustling a few yards behind me and quickly turned my head to that direction, only to see a figure moved quickly behind the trees away from the prairie.

Worrying for my own safety, I quickly ran and jumped over the fence as I made my way back home.

* * *

 

“Already up and disappeared from our sights, where have you’ve been?” my mother had her hands on her hips as she give me a disappointing look when I’ve reached home. “I’m sorry, I was out for a walk,” I apologized as I gazed onto the floor and tucked one of my hands onto my back, reaching for the other. My eyes looked up back onto my mother who had changed her expression into a sadder one, melancholy almost before she reached towards me and pulled me into a hug. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled tightly, not leaving a gap between us and buried my head into the crook of her neck.

 _And I would miss mother the most,_ I had thought as tears started to pool in the corners of my eyes. Mother withdrew our hug and cupped my cheek with her hand and smiled sadly as she sniffed, holding back tears I presumed. She then lead me to the bathroom, the tub had already been filled with hot water as I stripped myself from my clothes and dipped in, hissing slightly as I adjusted myself to the heat and my mother pulling my hair up and knotted it into a bun.

The water felt silky, and I could smell roses and lemongrass from the evaporated steam coming off from the water as mother started to lather my back and my arms. It’s been a while, since my mother had bathed me—the last time I could remember we were in this situation was when I was a little girl, well— _littler._ But she and I both know that this might as well be our last time bonding together, before its high noon.

* * *

 

I looked into my own reflection at the floor length mirror as mother fastened the zippers and ribbons on the back of my dress and I wondered who this young woman in the mirror was. Since we moved back to the countryside five years ago, I’ve discarded the city girl look long ago and accustomed myself with my surroundings, but it was also hard back then to adapt myself in this town.

A clear throat sounded at the doorway, we both turned our heads and saw my father looking at me wistfully before he came in and approached us both. I kept a tight lip around him, still hated about this decision he decided to make when he could have thought for a better solution than this. “You look beautiful, darling,” his hand reached out to touch my face but I quickly brushed him off and looked the other way. He recoiled his hand before letting out a sigh, and looked back at me with glassy eyes.

“I’m sorry it had to be this way, think of it as a way to save our family,” he then tried to console me but I shot him an annoyed look. “Save our family? Sounds like you’re just saving yourself, father,” I spat back at him and walked out of the room, not wanting to continue this discussion anymore. Heading back into my bedroom, I sat down in front of my vanity table as I my hand fiddled into my jewellery box and found myself holding a white rose hair accessory and grazed my finger at the intricate piece of metal and scowled at its meaning.

 _‘I Am Worthy Of You’, my ass_ , I had thought before I combed a few locks of my hair back and slid the accessory in place and looked at myself in the mirror and turning my head side to side. This gift, was an act of court in prior and I hated it since it’s what makes this all official and real, but I can’t hate it enough as it flatters me very well and wondered myself if I could possibly find more of these. A knock on the door interrupted my thoughts and saw mother in the reflection of my mirror as I turned my body to look at her and she looked even more sorrowed than earlier before.

“He’s… he’s here,” she stuttered and my eyes widened at her sudden announcement. Was it noon already? Time surely flies; I didn’t even take in account to visit every room in the house so I could remember it well. I stood up from my vanity table as my mother lead the way downstairs, stopped at my door frame and gave one final look of my bedroom before I started making my way downstairs.

First, I saw his big pair of boots and as I went lower the stairs, his whole stance was in my sights and when I arrived at the foot of the stairs, we were both looking at each other; his hand pulled off his hat and held it. At least one of us was happy for the time has come, but that person is certainly not me. I approached him with my hands enclosed and my eyes on the floor, only to gaze up into his eyes once we were toe to toe together and I could smell cigar and musk from where I was standing.

“Afternoon, miss,” Jesse McCree greeted me, his Southern drawl echoes clear into my ears and there were no words from me, but a curt nod. “I see you wore my gift,” his free hand reached out to the hair accessory but I graciously turned my head away, and his hand retracted and back to his side. “… Y-yeah, just for this occasion,” I voiced out, returning my gaze onto him and he smirked from my remark, satisfied to know that at least he did one thing right.

“I also got you another gift,” McCree handed me a velvet enclosed box. I carefully accepted and opened its latch, only to find a silver pendant necklace, with a singular ruby jewel. “McCree, please—you didn’t have to—““Hush now, I can spoil you with whatever from now on,” he cut me off before he placed his hat onto a stool and took the necklace from its casing and walked behind me. He was standing so close, I could feel his body heat and his scent was as stronger than before.

He parted my hair onto my front and I pulled it in place as he draped the necklace around my neck as he enclosed it at the back. McCree slightly pulled my hair back again and walked back right in front of me as he smiled and held the ruby in his hands, happy with how it looked on me. “Take a look at yourself, darling—you look even more fit to be by my side,” he grasped my shoulders and I gasped by the sudden contact before he turned me around for me to see myself at a mirror that hung in the living room.

I looked even more unrecognizable than I was this morning.

“It’s… very nice, McCree—““You can call me Jesse, from now on,” he bent downwards a bit with his mouth level with my ear and I shivered by the sudden intimate closeness. “It’s nice, Jesse,” I corrected myself, and he beamed when I said his name. “But—this is too much, I don’t deserve this,” I then continued but he shook his head in disagreement. “I don’t feel right if I don’t give you presents, especially on our special day,” he interrupted me once again and took one of my hands and enclosed it into his own, his metal hand cold on top of mine as he gazed down upon me and all I could do was stare back, no emotion visible.

“It’s time now, my dears,” my mother appeared at the kitchen doorway with a bunch of papers in her hands. Still hand in hand, McCree and I walked into the kitchen with her and sat down at the dining table with my father already seated before us. Mother then handed McCree the papers and he let go of my hand momentarily as he read the fine print and fiddled with a pen, clinking around the grip of his metal hand.

My father tapped his foot impatiently as McCree read through the papers, reading every line intently and occasionally glancing at me before he pressured the tip of the pen at the bottom of the page and closed all the papers before he slided it towards my father and he immediately turned onto the last page to check his signature, only to close it back with a smile on his face. My mother started sobbing uncontrollably beside me and I rose up and gave her one final hug, holding her close as I felt tears started to run down my cheeks as well.

Father then walked up to us as well and wrapped all of us in his embrace, and I didn’t even want to push him away than the many times he had tried this. As much as I hated him for doing this to our family, to _me_ , he was still the father that had cared for our family despite his many mistakes coming along. When McCree finally stood up, my father broke our hug and I faced McCree as he offered his hand and I cautiously took it before he pulled me closer.

McCree looked at my parents, a smile still plastered on his face. “May I, mister and missus?” he politely asked, father just nodded but mother still held onto my father and cried on his shoulder. McCree looked back at me and I looked up at him, as cold metal from his hands gripped my chin and bent lower and I felt tears slid down my cheek before our lips sealed with a kiss.

McCree cupped my face, pulling me closer to deepen the kiss, his bearded face faintly scratched my face and I hesitantly held my hand up to his. We both withdrew from the kiss and when I looked at him back, McCree looked like a brand new man, but I felt more like a wolf in sheep’s clothing. How far can I lie to myself that I don’t enjoy every second of this happening?

I am very well aware of what Jesse McCree can do if I don’t oblige. But I don’t know how long I am supposed to hold up this act, before McCree himself can hold his once we’re alone later. Going back into the living room, McCree put back his hat on and took my limp hand at my side and led me to the front door. McCree and I walked hand in hand to the front porch of the house, and I could see my luggage already outside.

McCree carried it with one hand and his other hand held mine tight and before we walked down the stairs, he turned back to my parents. “Consider your debts, cleared,” he only said before turning back front and all I could do was say to my parent’s goodbye as I looked at my home—or my former home, now a good look.

After hoisting my luggage at the side of the harness of his horse, McCree held both of his hands on the sides of my waist and lifted me up, as if I weighed nothing onto his horse. I adjusted myself on the saddle, at least making myself comfortable before McCree himself mounted behind me. The same body heat I felt before radiated behind me as he enclosed our gaps together and my back was in contact with his chest.

I turned to see my former home for the last time, the image of my mother crying onto my father’s shoulder as he tries to comfort her etched in the edge of my mind. I felt more tears pooling around my eyes and I turned back front and wiped them with my fingers and quietly sniffled. “I’m sorry we have to do this, sweetheart,” McCree half-heartedly apologized as he whipped his reigns, telling his horse to move and your whole being shook by the sudden forced movement of the horse as it trotted along the pathway.

“But from this day on,” McCree continued as I looked up back at him as he met with my gaze, a confident smirk played on his lips. “You’re going to be known as Mrs. McCree,” he happily announced and my right eye twitched form my sudden new title but McCree snapped his mouth closed, as if he thought of something better.

“No, you don’t look like a missus to me,” he then thought a bit deeper. “Ah, I know what suits you more,”

“Lady McCree.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Rape.

Jesse McCree; handy gunslinger, most wanted in this county, and now outlaw turned in-law.

How could someone like Jesse McCree would be involved with my life?

Before we moved back to the countryside five years ago, my father was struggling with his business and was already in great debt. From the time in which I lived outside the county, we’ve move around for almost 6 times, before we decided to go back where we first started. I didn’t mind—I had little names to remember and few faces to cherish.

The one thing that my father did not mention was that we were on the run; the constant moving to smaller houses around those times was just a façade to avoid those who were involved with his business. Growing up in a more modern place, I did my best to support my family as well—not leaving it all to my father to deal but I was only in high school, the most fruitful job was working at a bakery. As much as I hated that job, I had to keep my head up high to earn at least the minimum wage they had to offer, taking every shift in which I could and also fill in someone out of request.

Life started going down, and as soon as I was out of high school, we moved back to the countryside back at our house in which inhabitant by my grandparents that soon passed away not long after I finished school. My dreams to continue to tertiary education would only remain a dream, knowing that my parents could not afford to send me away and I came to accept the fact that hard labour and determination would only make me earn for myself and my family.

Word travels fast when we returned, and the Deadlock gang has already set their sights on us. Jesse McCree was a part of that gang when we first got back, that’s where I first saw him, too. Soon, my father’s former business partners commissioned Deadlock to capture my father, dead or alive—and make our family lives a living hell.

It was hard for us to live there, the people started avoiding us knowing that we are the prime target for Deadlock and they didn’t want anything to do with us so it was hard for me and mother to actually find jobs and also engage in social banter. We didn’t know how long it took, but it took some coaxing and good manners to convince the whole town we don’t mean any trouble, if only it was easier to say the same goes for my father since no one still trusted him, but mother and I still managed to support our family.

The day my father had brought Jesse McCree into our home was honestly the highlight of my life, and not in a good way. From that day on, I knew that it was the beginning of an end, for me at least. McCree had offered to my father an agreement he couldn’t refuse—my hand in marriage for the safety of my family. At first, we thought Deadlock sent McCree to settle things his way, and to our shock he revealed that he had left Deadlock, now a wanted man himself among the gang, which didn’t make our current position any better.

However, my father still accepted McCree’s offer, after knowing that he managed to smuggle all of Deadlock’s treasures into his pocket and he could offer to pay father’s business partners more than what he initially owed. At the end of the day, you were already courted with McCree.

* * *

 

It was probably been about thirty minutes, but the way to McCree’s humble abode was pretty far away from my home, and probably a couple of miles away from the nearest town. The whole ride was just complete silence—neither of us took the liberty to start a conversation, even for McCree as well. Once the vision of a cottage came into view on top of a hill, McCree suddenly let out a laugh of victory. “There she is, your new home,” he then remarked as his voice vibrated onto my back, my eyes still glued at the rather small wooden, cottage.

Maybe it was big enough for the two of us, but one’s things for sure is that it’s pretty far away from any other human contact other than the wild cows and horses at the nearby field. So, a call for help would be a longshot if necessary. “Or should I say— _our_ new home, darlin’,” McCree lowered his mouth down to my ears and I shivered. This was now my new reality, what would I give to live back at any of the houses that I’ve lived before, just to get away from this man.

When we reached at the top of the hill, McCree hopped off of the horse before he helped me down as I took my first new steps of my new home, or should I say—jailhouse. I looked around the cottage; take in the view of now what I would see for the following days if I was still alive. It was surrounded with unkempt grass, and there were weeds everywhere and my brain racked up the chores that had to be done—well, if only McCree would allow me to, that is.

My attention was suddenly cut short when I was lifted off from the ground and was carried by McCree, bridal style as he shot me toothy grin as I began to feel my face becoming hot. “J-Jesse, please put me down!” I cried out as I wrapped my arm around his shoulders, not wanting to be handled like a rag doll and I would break a bone or two if I was to drop down suddenly. “Now, don’t newlyweds do this? Carry their new little wife,” McCree drawled as he made his way towards the front door, and I clung myself harder onto him as he took heavy steps. “Over to the threshold of their new home,” he continued as he kicked the door open and brought us inside as I was too afraid to struggle against his hold.

“Maybe kiss a little,” McCree looked at me and pecked my lips to my surprise, my fingers reached out to my lips for the sudden contact and I could just _feel_ how red my face was. “Now, don’t go making that face,” he smirked as he finally put me down, but my hands were quickly being held by his in a tight grasp. “You make me want to do things to you,” McCree said in a teasing tone as he brushed his fingers on the back of my hand as I blushed harder. I was never for one with affectionate actions, so it took me by surprise when I could no longer function like I normally would.

“N-no!” I tried yanking my hands away from him, but his grip was tight, no thanks to his metal hand. “I mean,” I looked away from him, not wanting to meet his inviting eyes. “It’s too early for us, to do those… things,” I then remarked and sneaked a glance at him, and saw his expression relax. “Hmm, you might be right,” he finally let go of my hands as mine fell back to my sides and McCree pulled off his hat and scratched his head as he looked around the room.

“I know, why don’t I show you around?” he placed his hat back on and offered me with his hands on his hips. I blinked at his sudden offer, but I nodded anyways because now only I realized that the cottage was a whole lot spacious inside than it looked outside. McCree offered me his metal hand as I cautiously slipped mine into his grasp as he started to lead me around the house.

First, he showed me the dining area that was only just a small, round table with a vase that holds a wilted plant and only two seats that were both different from each other. “I can imagine having our meals together here, courtesy of your fine cooking,” McCree spoke out as he already made scenarios in his head but all I could see was dust, junk and also potential work area. McCree and I walked through the door that connects the kitchen to the dining room, and I imagined worse.

The counters were scratched and old, but were still usable but the same thing couldn’t be said to the sink, stove and an icebox. I could smell the icebox from where I stood, but that still doesn’t convince me it would be able to hold cold and frozen goods. “I see work cut out for me already,” I muttered under my breath, but it seems McCree heard it and seems to misunderstand what I was trying to say.

“Now you got it! This is where we’ll cook together!” he gladly remarked as he walked over the stove and tried to turn its knob only to hear it sparking, but no flame came out. “At least, until I get some gas for this stove,” McCree cheekily retorted and I hid a smile behind my hand but quickly caught myself as I reposed my face from any visible emotion.

Then he showed me the back, where there was a tub for washing clothes that was rusted completely and he assured that a fresh coat of paint would get it running and working in no time but eyes were rolled as I remembered the other things in the cottage that could use more than just a fresh coat of paint to be working. The bathroom was horrid, but at least there was hot water ready to use as I can’t imagine bathing in cold water early in the morning. But there was a generous amount of space in the back that I am mostly happy about so that I could at least start a garden patch.

McCree then brought me upstairs to the loft that would be our bedroom, which only had a queen-sized bed, an old wardrobe, and a cracked mirror that stood on the floor. By the longshot, this house was _bare_ , as much as you convinced yourself that it was going to be fine and there was dust everywhere. Did McCree only come home to sleep and clean up after himself before he gets his usual day going?

“Whaddaya think?” McCree asked behind me as I still surveyed the room. “There’s a lot of work to be done,” I remarked honestly, but McCree just grunted and took off his hat and hung it on a nail on the wall. He then walked over to the bed and sat down as he patted the space beside him. Seeing McCree on the bed already gave me red signs in my brain, this was not a good combination already.

“Come on, now, I don’t bite,” McCree reassured as I carefully walked towards the bed and sat beside him, leaving an arm’s length between us but McCree took the chance and scooted closer to me. “I know this house doesn’t seem much but—“ he turned his head to look at me as I met with his eyes, and they looked sincere almost. “I’m trying, alright? Getting all of this stuff already took a toll on my behalf, but I know this ain’t enough to provide for the both of us,” a cold, metal hand reached out to mine and gripped softly, almost assuring me for his effort to provide me a new home.

“And I’ll promise you, darlin’,” his other hand cupped my cheek softly, as I sink into his touch. “I would give it my 100%, more if I could, to make you feel like home,” McCree promised, and I couldn’t help myself to smile a little, as this was my first time seeing someone like McCree to show this kind of side that rarely met the light of day. He leaned in and placed a chaste kiss on my lips, and when I expected him to want more, I disgust myself when I felt disappointed he leaned away from me and stood up from the bed before he turned to me. “Come on, let’s make this _at least_ look like a home,” he beckoned with a short motion of his head out of the door. For the first time, after of what had happened today, I felt happy, hopeful almost that maybe this won’t turn out disastrous as I first had thought.

“Yeah,” I agreed, hopped out of the bed and instantly reached out his hand, and he was shortly taken aback at my sudden advancement, he halted his steps before he followed me out of the door.

* * *

 

By the time we finished cleaning up the house from what we could, it was already dark outside, and I was completely covered in dust and was worn out. Even with McCree’s help, cleaning this house was a whole lot of work and we both knew that this can’t be done for one day. We both decided to call it a day and he would go back in town tomorrow to pick up some supplies and groceries to make sure I was well accommodated into this cottage.

McCree placed my luggage at the floor of our bedroom as I followed suit behind him and he stretched backwards with his hands on his hips as he groaned lightly. He turned to me and eyed me from head to toe and crossed his arms across his chest together and stared at me. “Why don’t you get yourself cleaned first? I have to go and feed Webster,” he walked past me and went downstairs, going outside to feed the horse.

I looked at myself in the mirror, and I sighed as I saw the condition of my dress has been in. _My favourite dress, too_ , I thought as I ran my hands on the cream coloured fabric. Glancing behind me, only now I realized that we don’t have a door, only the stairs leading directly downstairs. I need to be quick, before McCree starts getting other ideas if he saw me half-dressed. Reaching behind me, I pulled on the tied bow on my waist letting it fall to my sides and unzipped my dress down, letting it pry off my skin and onto the floor. I had only worn my undergarments now, but it still showed a lot of skin and the straps were as thin as thread itself.

Looking in the mirror, I still realized I was still wearing McCree’s necklace and I quickly reached behind my neck but my hands were fumbling, trying to unclasp the necklace before I heard heavy steps going up the stairs. I quickly gathered my discarded dress on the floor and quickly covered myself before McCree appeared in the bedroom, his eyes widened when he saw me. Coming closer, he threw his hat off to the side, pulled off his one leather glove and dropped that on the floor, too and he didn’t break his gaze once as I stepped back before my bare back hit the wall behind me.

Once he was close enough, he reached for the dress I was holding and pulled it away forcefully from me leaving me completely vulnerable. Before I could attempt to cover myself with my hands, his metal hand grasped both of my hands and pulled me closer to him as I let out a whimper. Up close, his eyes were dilated, and were clouded with lust as his eyes scanned me from head to toe with his free hand grazing my face and down my neck onto the the jewel pendant and down the curves of my body as I shivered with his touch.

I tried to pull away, but his metal hand had it grip tight around my wrists and I looked away from him, shy and flustered now that I know what’s going to happen next. McCree pushed me back onto the wall as he inhaled my hair, and I felt tears on the brims of my eyes as his head ventured down lower and kissed me forcefully, his lips ravishing mine.

His metal hand scratched my hand hard, and I gasped at the pain and sneaky Jesse McCree took the chance and slipped his tongue in and continued devouring my mouth. No matter how I struggled, how I whimpered, his force was as strong as ever accompanied by the low growls coming from his throat. Tears had already spilled down my cheeks and McCree broke the kiss and licked the salty tears from my cheeks as he snickered.

“I never knew how eager were you for me, leaving yourself out like that for me to see,” he said in between kisses down my jaw towards my neck as I hitched my breath, shook my head but McCree just chuckled. “Jesse, please—I don’t want this,” I sobbed but McCree suddenly nipped my neck and I let out a painful cry.

“Hearing you say my name only wants me to go on, sweetheart,” McCree retorted as his eskimo kisses continued on down and I only cried harder, struggling against him. “I’m done playing house for today, it’s time for me to do what I should have done this morning,” his face was so close, almost leaving no gap between us. “Seeing you alone, it made me want you more,” his mouth was back on mine as I fought back, earning a bite on my lower lips as I yelped in pain.

My ears couldn't believe of what I just heard; not only was my special place, that one place that I hold close to my heart has been breached by the last person on Earth I would have to share with. How long did he know I would go there? Just for how long since he had been following me prior before this? Countless questions started to fill in my head and I was almost distracted before McCree brought me back from my trance when he squeezed my butt, bringing me into a blushing mess. 

McCree then quickly took off the hair accessory that was in my hair and unclasped my pendant effortlessly before he tossed it at the nearby drawer and tossed me on the bed, and before I could react to escape, he had already pounced on me and his mouth was back attacking my mouth no matter how loud I pleaded for him to stop.

His roaming hands found the straps of my bra and pulled it down effortlessly leaving my breasts completely exposed for him to view. McCree pulled back slightly, his hand still gripped my wrists together above my head, looking at the view of my bare torso as he licked his lips before coming down and suckled on one of them as a gasp left my lips and my back arched back.

His tongue swirled on the tip as his free hand fondled my other breast and I clamped my mouth shut, had I know that I would let out lewd noises if he keeps going on like that. But McCree was keen on making me sound off, his teeth lightly grazed my nipple and I let out a mewled cry and I could feel him smirked upon my skin.

“That was music to my ears, sweetheart—would appreciate it if you would just let it out,” McCree remarked before his mouth going back to devour my breast and I let out a grunt when he did. His other hand suddenly pinched my other nipple and this time, I actually let out a scratched moan as McCree looked back at me, a flustering mess as he smirked at me satisfied after hearing me.

His lips continued to kiss me down my torso until he reached my navel, and swirled his tongue lightly as my body arched from his soft tongue, his breath hot as burning coal against my skin. _God forbid me to enjoy that_ , I thought as I tried to resist. I truly became to panic when his lips had reached the top of my panties before he pulled it down with his teeth even if I did told him to stop. McCree then pulled back and let out a satisfied laugh as he looked at me, now completely naked, and all I could do was stare at someplace else other than looking at him, too shy now that he knows that despite being of marrying age already, still a virgin.

“It would have been my greatest privilege to accept first place, princess,” McCree remarked before he went down low on me. “And here I thought, a city folk like you would be used up for good,” he commented before nudging his nose on my mound. “W-wait, I – ah!” I was interrupted when his slick tongue came in between my holds and I arched my back by the soft muscle in between my legs.

Out of control, my legs wrapped around his head, pushing me to go closer and I could just feel his smile against my mound as I was starting to get into a moaning mess. As if his tongue wasn’t enough, his free hand suddenly inserted one finger inside of me, making me pull my head back at the sudden intrusion and matters only got worse when he started plunging in and out of there.

“P-please, stop… I don’t want it to be like this,” I managed to pant out but McCree didn’t bother to heed my words as he kept going on. He then inserted another finger inside me, and my thighs constricted together trapping him in between my legs as he pumped in and out and leaving me frantic.

His continuous laps from his tongue, the never ending pumps from his fingers continued on, until I felt what felt like my peak, with screams left my mouth as I felt my core spurs itself but McCree kept going on, letting me ride my high until I came down and panted frantically. McCree emerged from my legs, his beard glistening with my release and a satisfied smile plastered on his face before he brought himself up and kissed me back, tasting the remains of myself as I felt my stomach revolted itself.

“I think you’re prepped enough,” McCree suddenly said, my eyes widening when he discarded the rest of his clothes as he kicked his boots off followed up by his trousers before he stood up and pulled down his briefs, his erection sprang free and I was shocked to see one for the first time. Seeing one so up close made me flustered, especially something that thick would fit inside of me seems impossible.

“Jesse, no—let’s stop, please?” I begged but instead of an answer, he brought our lips together again, tongue and all as he snickered in the kiss. “And let you have all the fun? I don’t think so, sugar,” he held his length in his hand before he slicked himself up from the remains of my release down at my core, and feeling how long it was made me even more worried. It was going to hurt like a bitch the second he would penetrate himself on me.

“Bottoms up, sweetheart,” his tip was swirling at the entrance between my legs that was forcefully wrapped around McCree and I whimpered in defence but a few seconds passed and he started pushing himself against me, penetrating my walls as I let out a painful screech, with McCree groaned in delight. I could feel the blood trailing down my thighs as McCree readjusted himself with him still inside me and the tears still won’t stop coming down.

“Damn, darlin’,” McCree commented as he panted, before gathering all of his energy to move slowly at first. His hand didn’t grip my wrists together anymore, but both of his hands were already on my waist as he gained speed.

It sickens me how my body responded to his movements, my core slowly engulfing his length shamelessly. I brought my arms to cover my face as I panted in rhythm each time McCree moved, refusing to see his satisfied expression now that he has gotten what he wanted in the first place. His hands suddenly left my hips as he loomed over me and placed his elbows at the sides of my face, forcing me to look at him as we panted together, his speed regulating between me.

When he started getting rough, my arms instantly wrapped around his shoulders out of instinct, pulling him closer, getting himself into me deeper as I pleaded for him to stop. “You don’t look like you want to stop,” he smirked before crashing our lips together, muffling out my noises as he moved erratically.

“I want you to scream for me now,” his mouth was so close to my ear, he casually licked the shell of it as I squirmed from the sudden tickle of his tongue. “S-stop, I don’t feel good,” I tried to compromise but McCree just chuckled, his breath warm against my skin. “Don’t worry, darlin’—it’s going to feel good later,” he reassured with small kisses on the side of my neck as I mewled and squirmed from his touch.

His movements became rapid, and I could feel myself tense from each of his thrusts, already feeling my peak about to break. “J-Jesse, I’m gonna—““Me, too, sweetheart. Together, alright?” McCree suggested and I mindlessly nodded as I clung onto him as he braced himself against the covers of our bed, creaking against the floor. When McCree thrusts himself into me deep, that took the cake for me for my legs to suddenly contract and I mistook the ceiling for stars as I pulled my head back, screaming McCree’s name as I gave in to my release.

McCree soon followed suit not long after, as he shouted my name out and I felt his hot fluids filling me up inside. It was so hot, I was practically burning and my breathing was so irregular I could barely tell the difference between my pants with McCree’s. McCree pulled me out slowly and I moaned feeling the hot mixture between my legs dripping out of me but my thoughts were soon distracted when McCree pulled me into a passionate kiss, sincere almost despite the things he did to me.

He rolled onto his side, and pulled me close as he draped his arm around my body, trapping me possessively. I wanted to push him away, I wanted to run into the bathroom to clean myself up—hell, I would even want to run outside away from him if I wasn’t so worn out by him. I curled up from my position, hugging myself and feeling so disgusted with what just happened, I felt myself crying again as my light sobs filled the room.

McCree’s other arm pulled me closer until my back hit with his chest, an attempt to comfort me. He can’t go back being all sweet all of a sudden, not like this. Why did I start to think he actually cared for me? Where in my right mind I accepted his sweet gestures, laugh at his remarks or even allow himself to touch me?

I continued to sob, accepting the fact that this right now would be my life.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: bathroom rape

_“Thank you for buying,” I curtly bowed at the aged couple, waving at them before they went on with their day. Business was going well; my pastries were gone by noon was upon the town. I’m glad that my grandmother’s classic pastries are a clear favourite, I let out a satisfied sigh knowing the late nights I’ve tried to perfect the recipe has been paying off, finally._

_There was only one piece left, and it was the one that was considered a reject by my mother because no matter how same it would taste with the others, people would still choose the ones that are more appealing. As much as I loved grandmother’s pastries, I was growing sick of eating them so letting me eat this one was already out of question._

_Suddenly, a loud crash sounded at the nearby saloon behind me. Turning around, I saw a tall cowboy being thrown out of the saloon by two large men as they dusted off their hands before going back inside. Out of sympathy, I approached the man but he got himself up first, cursed fowl words towards the saloon and spat on the ground before he turned towards me._

_Realizing it was Jesse McCree, I froze in place and it was already too late to run when he looked at me with a tantalizing gaze. “And what can I help you with, lady?” he questioned at me sternly, as I stiffened up. Out of instinct, my hand reached into my basket and grabbed the piece of rejected pastry and offered it out to him. Jesse McCree looked at me weirdly, cocking an eyebrow at me as I tried to find the words to give an excuse._

_“Here, free of charge,” was all I could muster up to say and his expression relaxed. His hand, his real one, accepted the pastry graciously and before he could say anything else, I immediately turned around and trotted away, ignoring his callings and just walked straight away from him._

_“Thanks a lot, lady!” he shouted out, and I glanced back at him and nodded before I ran back home._

* * *

 

Loud snoring was what woke me up in the first place, and I felt suffocated from the enclosed grip of Jesse McCree. I pry myself out of his arms, and shivered when my bare body felt the cold atmosphere of our bedroom. I glanced at the wall clock, hoping that it was at least functional or else I was just stuck in a time loop, and realized that it was almost 6, and dim blue skies started shining out of the window.

I looked back at McCree, who was still asleep, snoring loudly and probably deep in slumber. _I could kill him now,_ I had thought but then that would make me nothing less than McCree already is—a monster. I shook my head, and grabbed the toiletries that I had packed yesterday with my towel and went downstairs to the bathroom.

The bathroom was still in working progress, but at least the necessities were functional and also decently cleaned but maybe a few scrubs with bleach would make this place spangling. Filling the bathtub with hot water, I poured in a bit of essential body oils that’s my saving grace that would make me feel less disgusting after what happened last night.

I grimaced at the thought, on how McCree touched me everywhere his hands would be able to reach. Glancing at the cracked mirror hung above the sink, I turned my head every angle possible and saw the light marks that was left by him. It wasn’t that _bad_ , that I would admit but I appreciated that McCree at least was gentle with me. I scoffed at the sudden thought of how he would put up being gentle with me.

I stepped into the tub, exhaling in satisfaction as my body started to warm up and leaned back in the tub as I submerged myself deeply just below my nose. It was crazy, why am I not acting as if yesterday never happened? Have I come to terms that this would be my life now and I should just roll with it?

 _No,_ I thought as I sat back up, my hands bracing on my knees. I am not going down with this—not until Jesse McCree himself would respect my cries and refusals. I then proceeded to clean myself up, starting from between my legs. My hand scooped of what seems to be the remains from last night, and there was dried blood sticking to my inner thighs as I lightly scratched them away with my fingernails.

“Mornin’, darl—“before that sentence was finished, I let out a piercing scream and turned to the door and saw McCree flinched wildly before he reposed himself. “Didn’t mean to scare you, suga—“”Can’t you see that this bathroom’s occupied?!” I demanded as I had my back turned to him, not letting himself see myself bare despite last night. My eyes followed down and saw that he was naked as well, and I felt my face warmed up and immediately turned away from his direction.

McCree let out a throaty laugh as his voice echoed closer. “Actin’ all shy now isn’t going to change anything, sweetheart,” said McCree as I turned my head slightly, and saw him bent down with his hands on the side of the bathtub. Looking the other way, I scooted myself at the other corner of the bathtub as McCree climbed inside with me but I still refused to make eye contact.

“Come here, darlin’, let’s get you cleaned,” McCree tried to pull me closer but I was quick enough to pull my hand away from him as I shot him a look. “I can do it myself,” I insisted but McCree forced his way and grabbed my shoulders and pulled me close, in between his legs until I felt my bare back hit his chest that was lightly speckled with hair.

“Let’s not make this hard and just do what I say so we all can get along,” his mouth was directly next to my ear as I lightly flinched, his voice silky and tempting almost. I sighed and brought my knees up and draped my arms over it as McCree poured in some shower gel onto his hand and started lathering my back in slow, circular motions.

His metal hand combed my hair to my front, lightly scraping my scalp and massaging the back of my head as I relaxed into his captivity. McCree buried his nose in my hair and inhaled loudly, taking in my scent as I shivered from his touch and his advances. Trying to scoot away from him, I dragged myself a bit forward but his metal hand immediately curled around my waist and pulled me back as I let out a small yelp and I could feel his hard erection resting on the small of my back.

“Last night… was amazing,” McCree started with his chin rested on my shoulder, his beard scratched the sides of my neck as I squirmed from it. His real hand then reached to the front of my body and lightly massaged one of my breasts as I let out a gasp, instantly trying to push him away but his grip was stronger and his metal hand was trailing a little low than he should. “Jesse—no, please?” I begged but he just let out a laugh, his chest vibrated against my back as he lightly grinded his erection behind me.

“After I got a taste of you last night? Not a chance,” he proceeded to kiss the sides of my neck, and kitten licks were peppered on my skin as I squirmed even more and let out more yelps. McCree’s metal hand reached between my legs and his metal finger found my bundle of nerves as he toyed with it. My back arched as I pulled back my head and mewled, God, I was still so _sensitive_ from last night but that had just felt too good to be true.

With his other hand busy on my breast, his other one in between my legs, I was where McCree wanted me but I still had the right mind to resist—not after what happened last night, I won’t give in that easily. My hand reached out to his metal one and tried to let him pull away but my attempts were faltered when he pinced my nipple and I let out a shriek.

“Come on now, sweetheart—it’s going to be quick,” he reassured, continue to leave me kisses on my neck as I started to pant heavily. “I don’t care, I don’t want this,” I then tried again, using both of my hands to push him away but it’s as if I didn’t even try at all. McCree’s metal hand continued to rub me down there, occasionally toying with my bundle of nerves as my thighs closed in together, trying to resist.

“I just wanna show you, sweetheart,” McCree continued with his groping as I try to fight back from my release, convincing my body to not react mindlessly just from his touch but that just got tough when he inserted a metal finger inside as he slowly pumped it in and out of my core and my cries filled the bathroom. “Of how much I adore your body, _so much_ ,” his finger curled inside me as I braced myself with my hands holding onto the sides of the bathtub and my thighs pressed against each other.

“I-I don’t like this, Jesse,” I then stated and to my surprise he retracted his hands away from me, and when I was about to process on why he did that, I was forcefully being lifted up with his hands under my armpits and I was slowly being eased onto his erection. McCree groaned as he penetrated me and I let out a moan feeling his hot, length inside of me. “Trust me, you’re going to _love this_ ,” McCree assured as he started to buck his hips as I let out a yelp each time he did. One of his hands fondled with my breast as the other gripped on my waist, steadying me into moving and my hands were still braced on the sides of the bathtub and my pants were quicker.

McCree bucked his hips harder and I was moaning uncontrollably as I felt McCree’s head rested onto my shoulder blades, his breath hot on my skin as my lewd noise accompanied by his grunts. His pace quickened, and so did my movements, but then not sooner enough, my legs quaked and I felt myself rush from my head towards my core as I rode it off with McCree still bucking his hips.

I was beyond exhausted when I recovered, but McCree still hasn’t come yet so I was far from done for. His speed gained than before and in just a matter of seconds, he spilled his hot seed inside of me as I groaned from the heat coming from my core as McCree screamed out my name which could possibly heard from outside.

Once McCree reposed himself, he pulled out of me and turned me around as he kissed me deep and I was too tired to fight back. I cursed at myself mentally now that I was all dirty again, and the essential oils I poured in was all put to waste now that its mixed with our fluids together.

McCree then pulled out the drain stopper as the water slowly subsides and he reached out the shower head from above and twisted the knob on the wall as water came spraying out. I just sat there, as McCree helped me shower and cleaning me up and was especially attentive to my abused core making sure there was no leftovers inside.

“You can go now,” he suddenly said and I turned to him, looking at him confusingly but he just nudged his head towards the bathroom door. I then climbed out of the bathtub and wrapped myself in my towel as McCree then proceeded on getting himself cleaned before he looked at me and smirked. “Or were you planning on to stay and watch?” he asked but I immediately turned to the door and closed it back as I leaned back on the door, feeling stupid for suddenly feel flustered.

After I got myself dressed, I already felt even tired when the day had just started. McCree totally took a good one from me and if this keeps up every day the moment I would wake up, then there’s no work would be done.

Going down the stairs, my stomach rumbled lightly and I could feel it aching for some filling as I sighed. Not only am I tired, but _hungry_ as well—extremely at it, too. And there’s absolutely nothing in the kitchen, save from the water that can be drank but even for that I was still cautious about.

I then continued to think about what to eat as I sat down on one of the worn out couch that definitely needs to be tended to. Maybe I could find something edible outside? But what I would be able to find than overgrown grass and weeds everywhere? That seems to be a feast for a horse but definitely not going to work for an adult human being.

Muscular, thick arms suddenly draped around me as I felt McCree’s chin resting on my head and I gasped in surprise. Just for how long was I lost in thought until I hadn’t realized McCree had finished with his shower? “Whatcha’ thinkin’, sweetheart?” he then asked as I stared at my hands, keeping my silence. Does he really expect that I would pretend as if nothing had happened earlier? Normal people don’t do that, and I like to be very sane when I’m around McCree, thank you very much.

But my stomach says otherwise and let out a loud churn as I withstood the pain from an empty stomach. “Hungry, eh? But there’s not much food around here,” McCree then nuzzled his nose into my hair, taking in my fresh scent. “And keep your wife starving?” I challenged him bravely but McCree just snickered.

“’Course not, I may be former Deadlock, but I’m not completely a monster,” he retaliated but I scoffed. “Hold on for a while, sugar—let me get ready and we can go to town together,” he retracted his arms away from me but my ears perked from his statement and I turned around to meet his eyes. “Aren’t you on the run?” I then asked but McCree cocked his head to the side, a smirk plastered on his face.

“Not that town you’re familiar with,” he then claimed and leaned in and pecked my lips lightly before he made his way upstairs to get ready. “And no peeking, please,” he teased but I rolled my eyes. _As if_ , I thought as I turned back around and crossed my arms across my chest.

But a question lingers in my mind after what he had said.

A town that I’m not familiar with? I know we’ve been gone for a while from this county, but there’s nothing that had changed too much after we moved back and I’m not aware if there’s a new settlement that had been formed from when we’re gone or did I miss a memo?

McCree’s heavy boots stomped downstairs as he brushed his hair back and put on his hat. I then stood up and followed him to the door and before I could reach out to the door knob, McCree grabbed my hand and pulled me back a bit before he himself opened the door for me.

I shot him a look but McCree just smiled at me cheekily and lead me outside as we then started going to this mysterious, said town.


	4. Chapter 4

Webster, our sweet little stallion, trotted along the path but the poor thing had to pull alongside a wheeled cart because McCree said there were a lot of things to get and he would like to make the most out of it because coming back to this town would be a hassle. Of course, I don’t recognize these parts of the county and the trail wasn’t completely worn out so it left a very vague path to this secret town McCree kept on insisting on.

After what seem to be a while, I started to notice that we were surrounded by high mountains and the air started getting a bit chilly. I only saw these mountains from afar, and my parents kept saying that there are just wild animals around these parts so I paid no attention to it but seeing the place here for the first time is like stepping into class on the very first day.

Deep into the mountain range, a fallen long, boulder rested on two elevated hills, and to my surprise, there was a small settlement under the covers of the boulder. “What is this place?” I then asked as I turned my head to McCree. “The closest town I could actually set foot on,” he then stated as I turned back to see the quaint settlement.

Once we arrived, Webster trotted slowly inside and I could see that were a lot of small merchants littered along the sides of the walls of the settlement as they were a few handful patrons stopping by each place. Hopping off the horse, and helping me down while at it too, McCree held onto Webster’s reigns as we started walking and my eyes scanned around the unfamiliar place.

I could recognize most of them were Deadlock’s former targets before they were considered to be AWOL and it amazes me how they managed to get out of their hands and start living another life here. Of course, I don’t know their stories but they are most likely being targeted on petty things knowing how Deadlock acts around my town.

“Well, look who it is!” A voice boomed at the far right of us and when I turned to see who it was, a short, burly man shot McCree a toothy grin and McCree nodded at him back. “Good to see you again, Joe,” he then greeted as he approached his shop and I followed along as Joe then looked at me.

“And who might this little lady be?” he then asked as I stammered, not knowing how to introduce myself but McCree stepped in. “This here’s my new wife,” he proudly said and Joe’s eyes bulged out, surprised to hear what McCree had announced.

“You got hitched while you were gone?” Joe then asked as he howled happily, not believing his ears that his friend has wed. “You got a good one, too,” Joe then eyed me from head to toe as I blushed and hid myself behind McCree and he then grabbed my hand. “Well, don’t I deserve the best ‘round these parts?” McCree drawled as he bellowed a laugh and Joe joined him as well.

“Pleased to meet ya, Mrs. McCree,” Joe then said and I slightly flinched, hearing my new name being called suddenly. “Uh—that’s Lady McCree,” McCree then corrected Joe and he gaped his mouth and nodded in agreement. “Hm, seems fitting,” Joe agreed as I bowed at him slightly.

“Pleased to make your acquaintance, too uh—“”Just call me Joe, everyone does,” Joe insisted as I nodded slightly.

“So, what can I do for you both?” Joe then inquired, finally getting on why we’re here in the first place. “You got any gas? For the kitchen,” McCree then asked as Joe nodded. “Yup, got that—ton of them too,” he confirmed as one thing ticked off from my mental checklist.

“What else you need?” Joe asked again as my eyes scanned around his store, and for such a small space there were a lot of things that was set to be sold.

And they were at random, too—not categorized accordingly. A stack of cookbooks, a box set of old cassettes, an antique-looking lamp, an old gramaphone, and also a chess set with incomplete pieces were to name a few that littered around his shop. My eyes then fell upon a small basket, filled with balls of yarn and a pair of knitting rods pinned in one of the yarn.

I gave up a lot of things after I moved into the city, but I never gave up knitting no matter what my peers back then mocked about me being a grandma. Knitting is a hobby that only patient people would have to take their time and be satisfied with the final outcome, and it saddens me that no one seems to realize that fact. I am forever grateful to my grandmother that had taught me knitting; it was one of the things I could remember her by and know that she’s close to my heart.

“See something you like?” McCree suddenly interrupted my thoughts but I immediately looked the other way. No way am I going to ask for McCree to get a used basket of knitting materials; he already gave me too much—and more, then what I could ask for. The gifts, the rundown home, and even going as far to go and buy things to keep me well tended to was already enough and I don’t want to make him feel like I am forever in his debt.

“Not really,” I then said but the corner of my eyes still followed the knitting basket. McCree let out a gruff sigh before he turned around and pulled Webster alongside him. I still had a lot of questions to ask about this place, but I don’t know if I should ask considering everything is pretty hush here and I could only presume everyone else here don’t want to recall their lives before being hunted down.

Following McCree around, we managed to get a lot of things that’s needed around the house and my brain can’t solve how McCree managed to actually afford all of this. Just how much has he smuggled from Deadlock until he can afford a house with all the furniture albeit out of date ones inside of it? Before I was forced into this marriage, I only McCree as this big, bad guy of the West and also not really likeable even within his former Deadlock gang.

We then stopped at a small canopy where there’s a man, probably around my age, tinkering something he’s holding in his hands with full focus, almost not realizing that we had stopped in front of his shop.

“Hanging tight there, Terry?” McCree called out as the man finally looked at us and he gaped at the sight of McCree. “Well, if it isn’t Jesse McCree himself,” Terry stood up from where he sat and reached out his hand as McCree grasped it with his hand and shook it.

“Been a while, eh?” Terry then remarked before he realized my existence beside McCree. “Uh…” Terry trailed off as he motioned me with his eyes, signalling McCree about my sudden involvement with McCree. “Oh right, this here my wife,” McCree cocked his head at my direction as he smirked at me. “Introduce yourself, darling—Terry’s an old friend of mine,” McCree assured as I took a breath and cleared my throat as I faced his friend.

“Hi, I’m Lady McCree,” I merely curtseyed a bit, my mouth left a bitter taste after referring myself like that before looking back at Terry as he slightly bowed at me. “He’s a city slicker like you, just so you know,” McCree then informed as I narrowed my eyes at him.

“ _Was_ , a city slicker,” I then corrected but McCree let out a laugh as Terry joined him as well. “Well, what can I do for y’all today?” Terry drawled out probably the worst Southern accent I had actually heard. Thank God my accent actually wore off back then.

“Think you could come over our place to get a few things fixed? Namely an icebox,” McCree then asked as Terry closed his eyes, thinking probably about the possibility of fixing our house. “I could make it—but not too long, though; I got another fixer upper across town,” Terry then agreed as McCree smiled satisfyingly.

”Thanks, Terry—I owe you one,” McCree then proceeded on telling him where our house was, and I’m not sure if it was okay to reveal to other people where our location is for the possibility of being ratted out even by your trusted friend.

By the end of our trip, our wooden cart was filled to the brim with items including the gas cylinder, two cans of paint, three paintbrushes, old pots and pans, a few spatulas, used plates and cutlery and—get this, _an old radio_ and also a few groceries so that I could actually start cooking and feeding the both of us at home. Hopefully, with all of this stuff it won’t be much of a burden for Webster to drag it out back home considering it would be a long way.

“You sure you don’t need anything else, darlin’?” McCree asked again as we were back out front of the place now, as I gulped and shook my head. McCree cocked his head to the side and raised his eyebrows as I avoided his gaze.

“We’re not coming back here for a while, you better pick out something you want,” he pressed further and I sighed. No matter how much I’ve been distracted, I can’t get my mind off the basket full of knitting materials. I turned my head back to Joe’s shop, and eyed on the basket again—if only I could actually say what I want to McCree without feeling guilty or scared even that he would say no.

“That one?” McCree suddenly walked towards the shop and I gasped in surprise as I waved my hands frantically. “Jesse, no—you don’t have to—“”You could just say so, sweetheart—I don’t mind,” McCree reassured but I still kept trying to stop him but he had already grabbed the basked and brought it to Joe.

“Hey, Joe—how much for this one?” McCree then asked as he held up the basket and Joe looked slightly taken aback. “Taking up a new hobby, McCree?” Joe jokingly asked as he let out a chuckled and McCree just followed along with the joke. “Probably not this time around, it’s for the lady,” McCree then corrected him as Joe nodded.

“Just take it,” Joe then said and I widened my eyes at him. “No, please—we can’t just take it,” I then stepped forward but Joe waved this hand off. “It’s fine—consider it as a wedding gift,” Joe then winked at me as I slumped my shoulders in defeat before raising them up again and looked at him. “Thank you, Joe,” I then said with a smile and Joe just flashed me a toothy grin as McCree tipped his hat at him.

“Thank you kindly,” McCree thanked again as he put the basket down in the cart. McCree then walked over me and held my waist as he lifted me up on Webster. “We best be off now—don’t want to get home too late,” McCree said as he hopped on and tapped the spurs of his boot at the side of Webster, signalling it to start moving and it did.

My head craned behind me as I saw the marketplace getting smaller in view until it disappears completely out of my vision before turning back around front. Countless questions started filling my head but I don’t know if I was either scared or don’t know where to begin with asking McCree but either way, I can’t get my mind off of that place.

* * *

 

Once we made it back home, it was already past noon and poor Webster was exhausted carrying the weight from us and also the cart, the moment McCree hopped down and detached the cart, it instantly trotted into its stable bringing me along as it drank his water intently from its trough as I tried to swing my legs carefully off the horse.

But I underestimated on how tall Webster actually was and braced for impact until I was caught by McCree in his arms as I gasped in his hold. “Whoa, there, darlin’,” McCree stabled me in his arms and I instantly clung around him until I could feel my legs landed on the ground.

“That was close, don’t wanna ruin your pretty dress,” McCree let go of me as I brushed off the dust from my dress.

“Yeah, the washing tub isn’t actually functional now,” I then recalled, the thoughts about the marketplace pushed aside and was replaced with the damage that had to be done to the house.

“Speaking of which,” McCree suddenly headed back to the cart as he carried both of the paint cans before he turned back to me. “We should move these things out of the sun,” he then said as I approached him and grabbed a few things that I can as he walked to the front door and unlocked it before he headed inside as I followed.

Once all of the things got brought inside and McCree put away the cart next to Webster’s stable, we both sat on the couch trying to catch our breath. McCree looked tired especially, considering he had to handle riding the horse and his hat were thrown off the side of the couch.

I didn’t expect we actually got a lot of things from the market and the more I think of it, the more I pitied Webster for carrying them with us all the way back home. “So,” McCree suddenly said in between his pants. “Knitting, huh?” he then asked as his eyes gazed on the basket of knitting supplies perched beside the front door.

“Y-yeah, I knit,” I said, as a matter of fact as I turned to look at him. “Think you could whip something up for me?” McCree raised his eyebrows at me, slightly smirking. “Then be nice,” I teased lightly as McCree let out a chuckle.

“Fair enough,” he said before he pulled me close to his chest. I would fight back, push him away but I was still worn out from today’s trip and putting away those things already worked me to the bone.

I rested my head on his chest, relaxing into his embrace as his chest heaved lightly, shifting me up and down slightly as I heard the fast pace of his heart. It was bizarre, I thought I hated McCree enough for all the things he had done.

But I can’t discredit his effort for providing me a home, even going out of his way to make adjustments to the house to my liking and ensure that I was being taken cared off. McCree might have taken away from my previous home, but he gave me a new home that he was willing to share.

“Jesse,” I called out, looking up at him as he gazed down at me as he raised his eyebrows slightly. My hand reached out to his cheek, fingers grazed through the rough texture of his beard before I shifted myself up and closed my eyes as I placed a chaste kiss right on his lips.

When I pulled back and opened my eyes, I saw him wearing an expression that I never saw before and I would say that he looked astonished, as well as bashful from my sudden assertiveness.

“Thank you… for all of this,” I said as I caressed his cheek as his hand reached out to hold mine as he smiled, one side of his mouth tugged slightly and before he opened his mouth to say something, I stood up from him and kept my hands to my sides as I faced my back to him, trying to hide my flustered expression that I now wear on my face.

“We should go and have some lunch first,” I then said as I rubbed my forearm and looked at him from behind my shoulder, and he was still wearing that cute expression. “I-I’ll go change into something I could move properly,” I then said as I started to head upstairs before I stepped down a bit.

“Can you install the gas tank in the kitchen?” I then asked, McCree still stared at me before he shook his head out of his trance and nodded frantically as he stood up and went into the kitchen as I disappeared into the loft.

* * *

 

Using the new (old) pots and pans we got with the now functional stove, we could at least cook lunch. McCree showed great appreciation for my cooking, even asking for seconds but that didn’t surprise me knowing how big his appetite was based on the size of this man. After lunch, we then proceeded on giving our house the maintenance it deserves starting from the water source.

McCree figured out that the source was being clogged by algae that were probably older than the both of us. Using the rod of a mop with a metal brush tied to the end, we managed to clear out the drains from the algae that clogged almost half through of the pipe before we finally managed to get clear, smooth water coming out.

Next was settling with the washing tub. It was hard enough to scrap off the old paint first, but waiting for the primer we first brushed on to dry was literally watching paint dry. McCree was being a good sport for it, trying to keep a conversation going as I would pipe in a few times.

And then came the actual painting of the tub so that it would be reusable again as I think back the stained sheets of our bed and not to mention the laundry and by the time we were done, I convinced myself to do laundry tomorrow morning.

We took breaks in between, with McCree having to smoke a cigar as I kept myself busy with rearranging a few things in the house but nonetheless we got to sort any of the clutter that we had gotten or the ones that was already in the house.

By the end of the day, our house started to look like there were actually people living in it rather than it did before where it just looked abandoned and we found it out of luck.

McCree offered me to clean myself first before we had dinner together and I took the chance to really clean myself than I did this morning and I must have taken too long when McCree kindly knocked on the door as I made haste before I sauntered upstairs to be clothes.

After dinner, I offered to clean the dishes while McCree went to clean himself up next. Once I was done, the bathroom was already empty so I assumed he was done but by the time I went upstairs, I saw the perfectly shaped behind of McCree as he was trying to pull up his pyjama pants and I quickly turned around.

I never noticed it yesterday or this morning, but I cannot deny that McCree has a good body. Those years being on Deadlock and also fighting for him really kept him in good shape now that I remember how actually old McCree was. He wasn’t exactly the fittest, but he had some lean muscle on him.

“I thought I told you not to peek,” McCree chuckled as he shuffled towards me as I turned around slowly, my eyes still on the ground. His cold, metal hand cupped my cheek as he gently made me look at him with a clear blush sprayed on my cheeks as he smiled, sincere almost. He leaned in for a kiss, that I complied a bit before he pulled back and took my hand as he made me follow him to bed.

The sheets from yesterday was pulled off and piled up at the side of the stairs as a simpler sheet was replaced on the bed, but the blankets were still good to use so that still stayed the same. But I wasn’t going to take any chance to leave it be. As McCree laid me down on the bed, he momentarily got up and closed the lights before he joined in bed with me as he pulled me into his embrace.

“… good night, Jesse,” I then sounded, as I wrapped my hands around the frame of his body when I felt a soft peck on my forehead as his hands snaked around my waist to pull me closer. I looked up at him, the moonlight shining through our windows gave me enough light to see his face as he was smiling down on me and wished me good night.

* * *

 

When I woke up, I fluttered my eyes open when I saw McCree looked at me with drooped eyes, looking sleepy still as he gave me a small smile. “Good morning, sweetheart,” he then greeted as he tucked a stray lock of hair behind my ear. “You look pretty when you’re asleep,” he then complimented.

“That’s pretty creepy, Jesse,” I said jokingly and McCree was nice enough to laugh. “I know you looked at me, too when I was asleep yesterday,” he then countered as I let out a sigh. I sat up on bed as I stretched my arms as I heard the cracks of my bones and let out a tired yawn before I was being pulled back by McCree and found him pining me down on the bed.

“It’s still early to get up, darlin’,” McCree said as eyes my dishelmed night gown, it’s neckline out of place and my shoulder was showing as I blushed at my current condition. “There’s still work to be done, Jesse,” I then said as placed my hands on his chest, trying to push him away gently.

“That can wait,” he stubbornly said before he moved down and placed light kisses on the sides of my face before trailing down to my neck as I squirmed.

“Jesse, wait,” I said with a stern tone as I tried to hold his face in my hands, pulling him away as I forced him to look at me. “Not right now, please?” I said, with a gentle caress on his cheek as he looked at me longing, before he sighed in defeat.

“Alright, sweetheart,” he said sadly as I gave him an apologetic grin and brought our faces closer as I placed a light kiss on his forehead, a first one from me. He got off of me as he scratched his head as I sat up and got out of bed to get started with our day.

It still shocks me how McCree easily complied with my pleads, for the first time but I’m too scared to know just for how long he would listen to me if I don’t give exactly what he wanted.

* * *

 

Around later in that morning, Terry had come around our home to fix our icebox as we dealt yesterday. McCree put me in charge to make sure Terry doesn’t go anywhere around the house as McCree dealt with the situation outside the house regarding the overgrown weeds.

I need to keep watch that Terry only fix the fridge because I wouldn’t want anyone to snoop around our house when we only want them to fix this one little thing. It was awkward being around Terry, knowing we both just met yesterday which had brought me to the things I wanted to ask about the marketplace yesterday and if I was too scared to ask McCree, maybe it won’t feel that scary if I ask Terry.

“So,” I started as I shone a flashlight to where he pulled the generator of the fridge from its compartment as he fiddled its components with a screwdriver. “What exactly is that place?” I had asked as his focus remains on the generator. “Little Rock? It’s a safe haven for refugees,” Terry said, eyes still on his tinkering as I grew even more curious.

“Deadlock refugees?” I asked again as I reached out to a wrench as we exchanged tools before he instantly dug into the generator with the wrench. “Most of them are—but they are a few travellers here and there,” he explained.

Apparently, the things that were sold there were just remaining of the things that they had sold back in town before they were being primarily targeted by Deadlock and when it came to restocking, it was a suicide mission and that is where McCree would come in.

McCree had actually helped the refugees surviving under Little Rock and even help them as far as providing them the supplies they need to keep their business and wellbeing going on while still a part of Deadlock but they trusted him enough for that.

Almost all of the residents of Little Rock owed to McCree so much, they had considered him their saviour but they all had to keep him a secret from any other spying Deadlock if they ever found one. So, not everyone completely trust each other.

“And how did you end up there, Terry?” I asked as he stood up and stretched, relieving the kinks of his bones before crouching back down and worked on the generator again. “Cool story—I ran away from home, ended up here and dumb enough I was back then, I stirred trouble among Deadlock,” he explained and I widened my eyes at him, he was either oblivious or he just can’t smell trouble around the corner.

“Thankfully, McCree stepped up and dragged me away from them,” Terry stood up, wiped the sweat off with his arm before he placed his hands on his hips. “I owe McCree my life, so to say—even if it meant hiding away,” he looked at me as I stood up as well.

Who knew McCree was actually helping them and betraying Deadlock at the same time, and these people trusted him so much to consider him their saviour when all I see him is a monster. Sure, McCree had acted sweet towards me, and he listened to me for once but still doesn’t make up the fact that he took my innocence away without me agreeing to it.

“I can tell he likes you a lot, too,” Terry suddenly said as I snapped my head up at him as my ears didn’t believed what he just said. “Excuse me?” I asked, stepping closer as I folded my arms across my abdomen and scrunched my eyebrows at him. “It’s a no brainer, lady,” he chuckled as he pushed the generator back into its compartment and screwed it back in place.

“He’s totally head over heels for you,” Terry confirmed it once more as I felt my face heat up from the sudden revelation. I had always thought McCree was only using me for my body, or even treat me as a toy but I had never considered him to actually _care_ for me. Maybe I was just in denial, and didn’t come to accept the terms that McCree had been exceptionally nice to me because he actually liked me.

“Anyways, the icebox’s fixed,” Terry then proceeded on turning on the switch behind the icebox as it sounded quietly, not as loud as it did before and when I opened it, it was slowly getting cold and the musty smell was almost not there. “It should take a couple of hours before it’s good to use again,” Terry had advised, cleaning up his equipment as I helped along.

“And what about you, lady?” Terry suddenly asked as I passed him his tools and I raised my eyebrows at him.  “Do you feel the same way to McCree as well?” Terry suddenly asked nosily as I shook my head, but I felt the blush across my cheeks. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I quickly denied as I stood up.

“It’s okay to be shy—maybe you just don’t know yet,” he insisted as he stood up, carrying his toolbox with him and I faced him. “… You think he actually likes me?” I asked him bravely, avoiding his gaze still as he suddenly grabbed both of my hands and grasped into his own as I looked at him surprisingly.

“I _know_ he likes you,” Terry insisted, and the fire in his eyes convinced me that maybe McCree _does_ like me—or maybe more than that? I smiled at him shyly, and opened my mouth to say something before someone cleared their throat loudly at the kitchen door.

Turning my head only to find McCree, a scowl plastered on his face as I slipped my hands away from Terry and retracted to my sides. Fear suddenly filled within me, the predatory look McCree was giving was enough to make me hide in a corner and I could feel the air around us tense when he walked in. “Ah, McCree—the icebox’s fixed,” Terry said, obviously can’t read the current situation as he gestured to the fridge behind us.

“I can see that,” McCree said through gritted teeth, his eyes still followed mine and I couldn’t bring myself to look away. This looks bad, I had known—probably a large red flag in McCree’s eyes seeing my and Terry suspiciously close. Would he listen if I try to explain? Maybe he would spare me if I had given him the truth, and it really is the truth because I have nothing to hide from his except for the fact I think of him as a behemoth.

“Is there anything else you want to me fix? Yesterday, you said that—“”Actually,” McCree interrupted Terry as he stepped forward and towered over the both of us.

“You were just leaving.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: dubcon oral, attempted rape, and blood

After McCree saw Terry off, I had waited in the living room, sitting on the couch with my head down as the possible scenarios that would occur happens in my head. I was scared, of how would McCree react, of how he would deal with the situation and how he would take it when I would have the chance to explain.

McCree had entered back into the house and slammed the door loudly as I instantly stood up from the couch and faced him as he did I. Keeping my ground firm, McCree approached me with heavy steps as I braced for what’s to come next and I felt his metal hand tugged my hand harshly as I winced in pain.

“I guess city slickers _do_ stick to their own kind,” McCree spat as he pulled me up and I was bracing for dear life as I kept my gaze strong with his. “Jesse—you don’t understand, we were just—“”Trying to make Terry into your secret fella, is that it?” McCree suddenly accused and I widened my eyes at his sudden assumption.

“I would never!” I had tried to yank my hand away from him, but his metal hand gripped my wrist harder as I groaned in pain before composed myself. “I may don’t agree to our little arrangement together, but I respect you enough to not commit something to ruin ourselves,” I fought for myself, and my words hold the truth to it, too. As much as I felt trapped in our marriage, I didn’t have the will to betray him for another man’s touch.

“Then prove it,” McCree said through gritted teeth and let go of my hands as I inhaled deeply, before I stood on my toes and wrapped an arm around him as I kissed his lips deeply, and I had been slightly relieved he melted under my touch as he returned my kiss eagerly as our lips moved together rhythmically. I had become bold as I licked the seam of his lips as he granted access and opened his mouth slightly as my tongue invaded in.

McCree just followed my dominance, not trying to fight for it as he was very keen on me trying to prove myself loyalty to him. He wrapped his hands around my waist and pulled me closer and I gasped when I had felt his erection in his trousers on my stomach, this was not going as planned.

When I pulled away and caressed his face, I tried to find the relaxed look in his face but all I see was heightened lust and I knew what I was in for next. “Good,” he said as I sighed in relief. “But not good enough,” he said in a low growl when he pressed his hands down my shoulders making me kneel, and levelled with the crotch of his pants.

Looking up at him, he stared me down—patiently, almost as I had closed my eyes and gulped hard as I had gotten the message what McCree actually wanted. My trembling hands unfastened his belt, slowly pulling the buckle away from the loops and unbuttoned his jeans as I pulled down his zipper. My hands carefully pulled his jeans down, revealing his black briefs as I inhaled sharply seeing the outline of his erection right before my eyes.

Placing an experimental palm at the front of the crotch, McCree threw his head back and groaned in pleasure. Obviously, this is my first time servicing someone’s length and I was totally clueless on what move I should do next, but McCree had enjoyed the pressure of my hands against his erection, I wanted to tease him almost.

Sliding my fingers around the shape of the erection, in which shocked me when I had saw it expanding more as I retracted my hand and McCree noticed that. “It’s rude to leave me hanging, darlin’,” he bended his back forward, brows furrowed as I looked away.

“I… I don’t know what to do, actually,” I confessed, looking the other way as I tried to hide my now blushing cheeks as McCree chortled at me. “Ah… I forgot you’re actually new to this stuff, sweetheart,” he suddenly kicked off his jeans from his legs before he walked over the armchair next to the couch and sat down before he beckoned me to come closer.

Cautiously making my way to him, McCree parted his knees and gestured to the spot on the floor as I smoothed my skirt and sat in front of him. “Take them off first,” he commanded, as I nervously reached the hem of his brief and pulled it down as I can see the tip of his length peeking out before I had pulled them off completely as I take in the view of his full, erected length before me.

From the looks of it, I couldn’t believe that something as long and thick as that had actually been inside of me. McCree grabbed my hands and wrapped them around his length as I felt my face becoming hot, and oddly enough a sensation started pooling between my legs. _Am I seriously enjoying this or have I become crazy?_ I wondered as I felt his length twitch in my hands as McCree gripped my hands in encouragement.

“You can start moving now, up and down,” he instructed as I took a deep breath, and started moving my hands around his length as he groaned lightly from my touch. Does he enjoy this? Looks like he does, given by the relaxed posture he was in as I moved my hands up and down his length.

Experimentally, I moved one of my hands down his length and cupped his prostate as his thighs had tensed and McCree had started panting shortly as one of my hands stroked his length faster as the other lightly massaged his prostate. It felt odd, holding the other sex’s genitalia in my hands but that’s what to expect for a newcomer like me. I had become more surprised when there’s a small white bead had appeared at the tip of his head, coming out from the slit.

“You can use your mouth, too,” McCree recovered slightly, and suggested to me casually. Keeping a hand wrapped around his length, I leaned closer and kissed the tip of his head as McCree continued to grunt and groan from the pleasure he’s treated to, the small white bead now coated my lips and it tasted bitter, in a pleasing way almost as I licked it off my lips. Kissing back the tip, moving my lips to the sides of his length and occasionally leaving kitten licks along the way, I greatly enjoy the reactions McCree was giving as I felt myself being more excited for what’s to come.

Dragging my tongue back to the tip, I shortly dipped in between his slit as McCree tensed his thighs together and groaned louder, his hands gripping on the armchair as his breaths became shorter each time I pleasure him with my tongue. “Put it in already!” he growled impatiently as my eyes widened from his sudden suggestion.

Would it fit though? I don’t think it was possible for my mouth to stretch that wide to put it into my mouth—but I wanted to try, though. Taking a deep breath, I opened my mouth as wide as I could as I pulled the head of his length into my mouth and McCree groaned loudly at that. Valiantly, I circled his head with my tongue and that had made him squirm as well as I continued with my ministrations.

Carefully moving down, I slowly engulf his length as I tried to keep him still by bracing a hand on the side of his thigh as he shook from the warmth from my mouth. “Your mouth is so good, sugar,” his hand reached out to my head and patted me in encouragement, I couldn’t help but to smile and hummed slightly but that had pleased him even more.

“You’re driving me crazy there,” McCree chuckled as he pushed my head down gently until the head of his length had hit the back of my throat as I tried to control my gag reflex.

My whole face was now on his crotch, as my nose was nestled upon his pubic hair as I take in his manly scent. _Did he always smelled this good?_ I wondered, before I took a deep breath and slowly pull out of him, keeping the tip in my mouth as McCree moaned loudly. “Go on, sweetheart—suck me dry,” he ordered, and I complied.

Taking in his length again and pulling out repeatedly as I gained speed, the pooling between my legs had spread thoroughly enough, it had probably stained my underwear but that didn’t matter now—I just want to make McCree come undone from my touch. Bobbing my head up and down his length, my hand juggling his prostate, these touches had made McCree react like crazy as he non-stop moaned, his head thrown back on the headrest and his hand gripped my hair lightly.

His length in my mouth had suddenly twitched hard, and before I knew what happened, McCree moaned loudly and shouted sharply as he suddenly dispenses his load into my mouth unexpectedly as I could feel my gag reflex not taking it as it had reached down my throat as I quickly pulled out from him and coughed, trying to breathe as I let my mouth gaped, letting out the excess semen from my mouth. I take back about how semen tasted—it was something I did not want to take a lot from again.

Glancing at McCree, he had just recovered from his orgasm, readjusting the hat he was wearing before he stood up and approached me as he offered me a hand, in which I took as I tried to recover from barely choking of his semen. McCree pulled me up and patted my back lightly as I took in deep breaths before I had actually recovered.

“Sorry, sweetheart—didn’t mean to come in your mouth,” McCree apologized, his hand still patted on my back but I shook my head. “I didn’t know,” I had croaked out as McCree pulled me into an embrace. “You did well on your first try,” he brushed my hair as I regained my regular breathing and held onto him tight.

“Want to go again?” he suddenly asked and I instantly pushed him away. How could he say that… after I nearly choked on him? “Come on, sweetheart—I know you were enjoying it, too,” McCree grabbed hold of my hands again as I tried to fight him away. “Jesse, no—I’m not feeling it now,” I said, which was true—the burning sensation between my legs had died off a couple of minutes ago when I had tried to pull away.

“It’s fine—you should know what to expect next,” he suddenly bent down, and grabbed my legs together before hauling me up on his shoulder as I had gasped shockingly. Hitting his back with closed fists, McCree brought me upstairs before he had put me down and before I could go away from him, he forcefully pulled me into a bruising kiss as his hand had gripped my wrists together allowing me limited movement.

His mouth moved down my jaw, sucking it gently as I squirmed in his hold. “I’m so glad I own you, sweetheart,” he said in between kisses, one of his hands massaging the rump of my behind as I had gasped. “N-no,” I whimpered as I tried to fight against his grasp but clearly he has the upper hand in our position.

“Your daddy’s a wise man to agree handing you to me,” he then continued, kissing the sides of my neck as a scratched groan left my lips as he continued ravishing my neck. “I thought I had done your folks a favour—when I had actually hit the jackpot,” he taunted, as his hands slipped on the band of my skirt and pulled it down and off as he played with the hem of my panties.

“Jesse—no, please,” I had tried to push him away but he wasn’t listening, and I knew I had to take the next step further. “Jesse McCree, stop it now!” I had shouted and almost instantly, his ministrations had stopped before he looked back at me, a displeasing look on his face. “Is something the matter, sweetheart?” he asked sternly, as I felt fear again but there was no turning back down.

“I am not some property, or a prize to be won, _McCree_ ,” I challenged him as I had finally yanked my hands away from his grip as he stared me down. “If you want me to treat you like a husband, then you goddamn better treat me like a wife—a _fucking_ person,” I jabbed a pointed finger at him as I could feel angry tears around my eyes. I had kept this feeling inside of me for so long, I surprise myself how much gusto I had acted.

“I don’t think you get it, sweetheart,” McCree suddenly snapped, and I had fought the repulse to wince at him. “I _do_ own you—part of the agreement, see,” he walked past me and opened the drawer of the dresser and pulled out a copy of the agreement he had signed with my parents and flipped a few pages before he had brought it to me.

“Read it, and weep,” he smirked before he shoved the paper right into my face as I grabbed it and read the lines carefully.

_… with agreement from both parties, my daughter’s hand should be accounted for Mr. McCree and would give him full ownership in trade of the debt held account by…_

I didn’t even bother reading the next line as I had dropped the paper from my hands, my eyes widened after I had actually known what had been written by my father when arranging a deal with McCree. All this time, I had thought he only would give my hand in marriage—I didn’t expect he actually would _sell_ my whole being to another person.

“No,” I brushed my hair out of my face, still in disbelief of all the things that happened. My father was a terrible person, that I know—but I would have never guessed he would stoop so low to actually save _himself_. Tears started coming down my cheeks, as I had sobbed lightly with a hand enclosed to my mouth.

“Oh, yes, darlin’,” McCree approached me again and snagged my arm towards him as he rested a hand on my waist firmly, and there was lust clouded in his eyes. “And I’m going to eat you up, each and every part of your body I would know,” he growled beside my ear as I squirmed and pushed him away.

“Get away from me!” I tried to fight him by pushing my shoulders away from him by force. “Now, behave sweetheart—or I’m going to stop being nice,” McCree warned, as a hand trailed down in between my rumps as I felt a finger slowly circling around my back hole, _the_ back hole.

Instantly, I pushed himself away from me with all the force I could muster and tried to run away from him, only to have my leg being snagged by one of the foot of the bed, causing me to trip down and bumped into the mirror that was leaned against the wall, making it fall and shatter into pieces.

“Now, see you made a mess,” McCree stepped towards me slowly as I had forced myself to get up, only to sit up in prevail as I started backing up from him. “Stay away from me—I…!” suddenly there was something sharp, I could feel it across my palm and it had pained deeply.

Raising my hand, I could see my hand with three deep cuts by the shattered mirror. I was trying to process what had just happened, I hadn’t realized McCree had been calling for me and he was closer than before as I pulled my legs closer to my body as I screamed at him. “Are you okay? I—I’m so sorry, I—“”Stay away from me, you monster!” I shrieked at him, hot tears stung my eyes.

McCree stopped in his tracks from me calling that.

“Honey, I’m sorry—I only wanted to scare you—“”And you thought I would like being scared?!” I demanded as I stood up, my other hand finding support by the wall. “I don’t think you understand, McCree—I am completely _scared_ of you, you don’t need to remind me that every second,” I snapped, my hand was still bleeding from the cuts as I made my way to the stairs.

“Sweetheart, I—I just want to make you feel good,” McCree had tried to coax me but I stopped in my tracks before I turned back to him as I looked at him as if he was the most despicable person in the world. “No— _you_ only want to feel good, you forced me more than once, when I clearly said no!” I had recalled the times when he did to him as his eyes looked down on the floor in defeat.

“I… I’m sor—“”No, don’t bother,” I interrupted before I turned back around and strolled to the stairs.

“Saying sorry won’t change the way I think of you,” I started walking down the stairs carefully before I turned to look at him one last time.

“I hate you, Jesse McCree.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: blood mention and bullet cleaning

  _I_ _stared at the old sewing machine as it was being displayed at the front of the store._

_Due to scarce of food and money, we had to sell a few things from our house that previously belonged to my grandparents. Of course, I wouldn’t miss my grandfather’s old tuba and also his old record player but I had grown attached to grandmother’s sewing machine._

_Despite its old age it was still fully functional and I thought that we could at least make some clothes to sell but fabric and textiles were expensive enough so that had to be sold off from our house._

_I sighed before I turned around to take my leave, only now to notice that it was getting dark and most of the stores in the main square was already closed save for a few saloons that had blaring noises coming out. I hastily made my way back home before my path was encountered by a group of men laughing and also drinking at one corner of the street._

_Deadlock, I assumed._

_Trying not to make eye contact, I hurriedly crept away from them hoping they wouldn’t spot me._

_“Where you going, little lady?” I suddenly stopped in my tracks as someone called for me. I looked behind my shoulder, and saw them all now focusing on me before I turned back around and started walking fast but that had made matters worse. “Hey, it ain’t polite to run away now, sweetheart,” one of them sounded as I heard a number of shuffled footsteps started to go in my way._

_“P-please, I don’t mean any trouble,” I valiantly said, still keeping my stride as I clutched my money pouch close to my chest. But they won’t listen, the countless catcalling, the howls from their filthy mouths started to get louder and I could feel them close behind me before my forearms was being dragged from behind and I gasped in surprise._

_They’re disgusting, and hungry eyes followed from head to toe as I clutched on my pouch harder as I struggled against his grip. “You’re a cute one, that’s for sure,” he said, as his other hand started trailing down from my neck down to my spine as I closed my eyes tight and prepared to let out a scream before a gunshot sounded not far from where I from._

_I opened my eyes, looked around to see where it was coming from when I saw a tall cowboy, holding his revolver up in the sky as he faced towards us. “Let her go,” he sounded, and from his voice I instantly knew who he was as I felt the grip of on my arm loosened. I turned to them to see that they were all looking down on the ground, as they all one by one slowly backed away from me._

_“Now, git… before I make my rounds on you all,” Jesse McCree had threatened his fellow Deadlock comrades, only to be obeyed by them as they all ran away from me as McCree approached me and kept his gun back into its holster as he tipped his hat up as he stood in front of me._

_He was taller than I had remembered, and I could smell the cigar and gunpowder from him as well as a light musky scent._

_“Better be careful this time around, lady,” he then warned as I clutched onto my money pouch harder. He may have saved me, but he was still a wanted man and also one of Deadlock’s notorious gang members._

_“Easy now, ain’t trying to take anything from you,” he reassured as I let out a sigh and let my hands dropped to my sides. I looked back at him, and he kept staring at me—waiting, almost for something for me to say._

_“T-thank you, for saving me,” I said, almost reluctantly but genuine nonetheless for the big save he made for me. “Those Deadlock new recruits don’t know where they’re standing,” McCree said before he turned his head and spat on the ground. “Showing up like they own the town,_ please _—they’re ways behind for that,” he then said as I nodded slowly, taking everything in mind._

_“I also didn’t get to thank you properly for that other day,” he suddenly said as I looked back at him, eyes widened and shocked to know that he had remembered me, from when I gave him the last pastry._

_“That was the kindest thing anyone had gave to me for all the years I’ve been in this town,” he then admitted as I felt myself blushing. I never knew how he had taken it personally; I always thought that he would always have his way with anyone on this town._

_“I-It was nothing, I always give out the last of my food,” I had tried to find an excuse, but only came out with a poorly thought one at that. “Still appreciate the thought, though Miss…?” he suddenly tried to ask for my name, as I blinked at him as the gears in my head grinded and whether I should give him my name or not._

_He saved you; of course you should at least give him your name._

_But then again, you don’t know what would happened if you did gave him your name._

_“Come now, I just want to know who you are,” McCree then said as I snapped out from my train of thought. “Let’s start a new,” he suddenly said as he pulled off his hat and bowed at me like a gentlemen as I blushed harder from this sudden gesture; no one had done that to me before so I don’t actually know how to react._

_“Course’, you know me—Jesse McCree,” he then introduced himself, and I was contemplated by making acquaintances with a public enemy but a charming one at that too. Gripping on the sides of my dress, I gently dipped to a curtsey before I reposed myself back to him and opened my mouth to tell him my name._

_In which Jesse McCree had smiled at me for the first time._

* * *

 

It had been a few days after that incident, and I have gave McCree the cold shoulder ever since.

My cut hand had been slowly healing over time, but it was still hard to do work around the house I would rather leave it as it is than asking McCree for help.

He, of course, kept apologizing but I wasn’t buying it—he just made me so angry, I couldn’t comply to keep calm when he had gone his way that irks me in more than one ways.

However, despite my icy composure around him, we still worked together in the house but in the means of not intruding each other’s way. I would still prepare food for us, and we would sit at the same table and eat quietly as he would glance at me many times as I focused on eating.

I would do the dishes, only to be interrupted with a pair of arms wrapped around my waist from my behind as McCree would try to apologize again, but with a cold stare I pushed him away and went on with my day as he would try to get my attention.

McCree had also been out for the past couple of days, sometimes leaving after breakfast and only to return later in the day—not that I was waiting for him or whatever but I had realized his little pattern and I chose to use the time he was out to go outside and go as far as I could, before fear had come over me and forced me to come back home.

I was so close, to take back my freedom if only fear hadn’t stopped me and when McCree would come back home with Webster, he doesn’t suspect a thing and I had hoped he wouldn’t have noticed that I’d been visibly exhausted from venturing outside for long hours and he still seem to not ask a lot of things, too.

Of course, it was the same thing happened at night when we would want to go to sleep. We no longer sleep at the same time, as I would take the opportunity to sleep ahead first, only to wake up a few hours later with McCree sleeping beside me, keeping a distance between us as I grabbed my pillow and took my place on the floor and slept again.

However, when the morning came, I found myself back on bed with McCree taking my place on the floor as guilt started filling the void in my heart. This would go on for several days before McCree decided himself to sleep on the couch downstairs letting me have the bed to myself.

I would accept his apology, but those were just words.

I want to know that he truly learned his lessons, change his ways—stop acting like when he was in Deadlock, and start taking action from his mistakes and try to fix.

I don’t care where he would start; I just want him to stop forcing himself on me and start taking my feelings into account.

My feelings, in which I would admit I started to care for him, maybe even a little bit more.

That was instantly replaced with my own rage and hatred towards McCree.

It had been a week, I had counted, since that incident in which I wish to forget, and I started making plans in my head to escape.

I would take Webster with me, but that would just be easier for him to know that I had gone missing. If I had walked, I would have not gone far so as of now, I was stuck in this place before I would start to take things into account in which way is most efficient for me to escape from this place, escape from him.

* * *

 

On a rainy morning, I was downstairs, sitting on the floor as I knitted what I have been working for the past week—I don’t remember how I started it, or who it was for but it had kept me occupied from the rest of the silent treatment and cold shoulder I had acted on McCree.

Heavy footsteps came down the stairs, I didn’t bother to know who it was until I saw him into view as he fixed his hat and was facing me. Letting down my long needles down as I raised my head to respond to his calling, I could see he still wore the same expression ever since that day—sad, still apologetic and he didn’t even try to hide it, too which made me almost accept his apology instantaneously.

“… I’m going out for a bit,” he said, as tipped his hat upwards a bit. “And I’m going to be home late, so…” his words trailed off as I waited for him to continue. It had been a while since he tried to start a conversation with me, and also been a while since I had responded to him as well.

“Don’t bother waiting for me—just please take care of yourself while I’m gone,” he then said as I put aside my things and stood up before I approached him and stood before him.

“Then don’t bother come back,” I said coldly as his eyes widened and he opened his mouth to say something, but he closed it back before he tipped his hat down and started heading to the door and turned to me before he opened the door. “I won’t be long,” he just said before he went out the door and I felt my heart dropped as he went into the rain, and made haste as he disappeared from my sight.

I was just saying that, I don’t think I actually meant it. I was still angry with him, but my head was filled with questions on why he would suddenly leave me home alone.

Was he secretly in Deadlock and carry out their dirty work behind my back? Or was he desperate for physical affection, he would go his way to find another woman’s touch? I shuddered, the thought of an anonymous woman pleasing McCree… it made me slightly jealous as I started to deny them before I went back with my knitting.

* * *

 

It had been a long day—my knitting was finished halfway before I actually got up and cooked something for myself. McCree was still nowhere in sight, maybe it was better this way. It felt lonely suddenly, I had caught myself missing him for quite some time since he had been leaving the house for the past week but I quickly removed those thoughts and immediately kept myself and my thoughts busy.

I didn’t realize I had fallen asleep on the couch, but when I came to, I was startled by the loud roaring of a chopper outside as its headlights shone through the glass pane of our front door. Instantly standing up, I hastily opened the door only to find McCree limping in the still heavy rain towards me, my eyes followed down his limped leg only to see that he was bleeding—still bleeding while at it.

“What happened?!” I asked as panic started to rush through my mentality as I helped him inside as he groaned in pain, helping him lie down on the couch not caring that he was drenched in the rain that I had decided to take care off later. Removing his dirty boots and rolling up his pants, I could see where the blood comes from a few bullet holes on his leg as I gasped in horror.

“Who did this?” I asked again, trying to find clean rags to clean up the blood before I pressed them onto his wounds, carefully treating it as McCree groaned in pain followed by a low chuckle. “It’s funny actually—you should see the other guy,” he had joked but still let out grunts out of pain.

“Stop playing around, Jesse—what did you do?” I demanded, my heart pounding out of fear from the many possibilities he had got into to. “I was in town, trying to settle a few things,” he then started as he groaned more as I tended to his wounds.

  “I-I’m going have to pull out the bullets, okay?” I stopped him before he could continue as he flailed his arm, that I had noticed he kept on gripping that was probably injured as well. “Take a deep breath, and when I count to three, let it out, okay?” I had prepped him, cutting his circulation with a tied cloth around his leg as I prepared a pair of tweezers ready to go. McCree nodded, as he inhaled loudly as so did I as I started counting.

  “One,” my hand braced onto one of the bullet holes on his leg stretching it slightly, trying to get a better angle in which I could see where the bullet it as I felt McCree tensed.

  “Two,” I gripped on the tweezers harder, steadying my hand from trembling too much as I brought it closer to the wound.

“Three!” I exclaimed, as I gouged the tweezers inside the wound grabbing the bullet as McCree let out a painful shout as he exhaled and I dropped the bullet onto a dish as I wiped my bloodied hands on a rag cloth as I wiped his now cleared bullet hole.

This went on to the next couple of bullets, and I was glad that McCree was being very cooperating with my sad excuse of medical skills. I wasn’t the best, but I knew where to start when it comes to dressing wounds and that was good enough.

Once all of the bullets were out, and his leg was properly bandaged, I was in a sweating mess—I had never felt so pressured all of my life and McCree wasn’t too fussy to work with but I still had a lot of questions to ask him.

After cleaning myself up from his blood, and McCree was attended to with his other injuries, I sat on the floor beside the couch as I faced him, worry written all of my face as I had let him rest before I could start to ask him questions.

“What _happened?”_ I asked again; now ready to hear his explanation.

“I wanted to come clean,” he suddenly said and I widened my eyes at him. “I started giving information about Deadlock to the higher ups, see if they could get rid of them,” he then explained as I listened to him intently.

Apparently, he had approached the town’s sheriff and decides to turn himself in—and I could have risked not seeing him anymore for the past week but they made a deal together that the sheriff could not refuse. This had explained a few things for the times he had gone out since the past week.

McCree had offered them information, detailed ones at that about Deadlock’s whereabouts and how and when they start their dirty work. So, he brought a few of the sheriff’s underlings with the sheriff himself to one of their hideouts that McCree they would be around, at least a few of them.

It had been an ambush by them, and Deadlock was caught off guard and everything was going well, until McCree had noticed his chopper in their hideout and he never gotten to take it back when he was in Deadlock and it was now or never he would get it back and he knew he didn’t want to depend on Webster wholly when it came to transportation he went ahead and get it.

With the sheriff’s permission, he got the chopper back and he went ahead back home only to be shot on the way by hiding Deadlock members when he was on the way back home and he crashed down pretty badly before he shot them all dead, and managed to scrape by the pain as he made his way back home.

From his story, I felt the tears around my eyes.

I didn’t realize that I was scared of losing him—I didn’t know that I was capable of feeling this way about him. Grabbing his hand, I gripped it with both of my hands and started crying.

“Why… would you be so reckless?” I asked through the tears, as my glassy eyes met with his tired eyes. “I wanted to change,” he said as he brought his metal hand and caressed my cheek. “Change for you, because I know you still look at me like I’m in Deadlock,” he had said as my ears couldn’t believe his words.

“I… I know I did a lot of wrong things,” he admitted, his eyes drifted away from mine. “And I wanted to make things right, for once,” he stated as I leaned into his hand.

“It’s funny—I never actually see you as a property,” McCree suddenly chuckled but I shook my head. “It doesn’t matter now, it’s passed behind us,” I reassured, finally coming to my senses for once. “The things you’ve done before—I won’t forgive you about it, but please don’t do it again,” I admitted to him, finally coming to a conclusion on our current situation.

His forced advancements, his sudden roughness—I would never forgive him for that, but I would trust myself to trust him not to do it again and hoped he could learn his lesson.

“No, you’re right,” he suddenly dismissed my compromise as I looked at him puzzled. “I was an asshole—I know what I did, and I won’t pretend that I never did them to you,” one of his metal fingers wiped away my tears from my cheek.

“It’s just that…” his words trailed off again, as I waited intently for him to continue.

“I never thought I could bring myself to actually love you,” he confessed, and suddenly the whole world stopped around me.

“… What did you say?”

“I thought you heard me, sugar,” he chuckled, as he sat up despite his injured state and I was still too shocked to function from what just happened.

“I love you,” he said again, and that was all I wanted to hear from him—the most genuine thing he had said to me from all of this time.

I closed my eyes as tears were spilling and grabbed his face into my hands and brought our faces together to a kiss.

A real kiss; full with emotion, affection and our level of intimacy.

Pulling away slightly, our foreheads rested together as McCree smiled a little, and I tried to smile but the pouring tears from my eyes distracted me still. From tears of sadness and grief, came in tears of happiness.

“… I love you, too,” I had confessed as well, coming clean with my own feelings.

Jesse let out a chuckle, before bringing in my face closer for another kiss in which I happily return and deepened it, taking his current state into account. Jesse smiled against our kiss, as he proceeded on kissing all over my face as I giggled from the rugged texture of his beard that tickles my skin as he kissed me all over.

* * *

 

I had asked Jesse to rest, as he had a long day and he still needed to sustain to the injuries he’s gotten and it was now my duty to care for him even more. Changing away his dampen clothes into dry ones, I had to remain unbothered while undressing him while damn Jesse couldn’t stop smirking at my bashfulness, I would have hit him if it weren’t for his injuries.

Taking in the duvet of our bed, I had brought it downstairs so that there would be more space for Jesse to lie down onto than the cramped couch he was forced to rest on.

Moving aside the couch all the way to the wall, the duvet was spread on the floor and hopefully it was thick enough to ignore the hardness of the wooden floor but it was the next best thing than Jesse trying to climb upstairs to climb into bed before I had stopped him and forced him to stay down.

Lying down next to him, I had curled myself up with my arms crossed and rested on his shoulder as my head was planted in between them, carefully not to apply any pressure on him hard. It felt nice, cuddling next to him—he radiates warmth so much like a toaster I wanted to stick on him for the rest of my life.

“This is new,” Jesse chuckled, accommodating him to my sudden attachment as I accompanied his laughter when he turned my head to face me as I smiled at him. “I was holding back, thought you knew that,” I said cheekily as McCree let out a gruff sound.

“Right, and I suppose the kisses were you holding back, too huh?” he asked as I felt my face heat up and decided to ignore his question, and looked at someplace else as he chuckled.

“How long?” I asked him, looking back at him as he raised his eyebrows. “What was that?” he inquired, not following what I actually meant. “How long, have you loved me?” I again, more forward than before as I felt the heat spread across my cheeks to the tips of my ears. Jesse leaned back on his pillow, closed his eyes as he was thinking and I grew even more curious as I had waited for him to answer.

“I only realized that I loved you now,” Jesse looked back at me. “But I knew that it truly started when you gave me that pastry of yours,” he admitted as I giggled and Jesse furrowed his eyebrows from my sudden amusement. “You really can’t move on from that, can you?” I asked as I perched closer to him, and Jesse raised his arm before engulfing me under his arm as his hand rested on my waist.

“I can never forget the day I had met you,” Jesse declared as I relaxed into his embrace and breathe in his scent. “It was terrifying—I’m still terrified that day when you saved me, too,” I had recalled our memories together as we laughed together back at the thought.

“Well, it was my lucky day to save you from those Deadlock scum,” Jesse boasted as he placed his hand on my shoulder and pulled me close as he placed a kiss on my forehead. “I thought I would have never dealt with you again after that day,” I then said as my hands rested on the sides of his chest.

“But then my father had brought you home, and I was completely terrified beyond that point,” I then said and when I had expected Jesse to come up with a snarky response, his expression then turned into a scowl suddenly. “Jesse, what’s wrong?” I had asked, getting up as I looked at him worryingly, hoped that it wasn’t because of his injuries.

“About your daddy,” he said, as he closed his eyes.

“He’s dead.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh jeez thankfully somebody pointed out this chapter was missing lol

_Staring at my now bare bedroom, save for the bed, vanity table and closet, it felt almost miserable. But things had to be done to keep ourselves fed and father is slowly paying back his debts, with mother and I handing him some of our profits as well._

_I turn sour whenever I have to think of father; he’s done so many things wrong out of impulse without thinking, I had grown tired to advise him. His poor decisions had taken a toll on our family, but mother has been never stopped supporting him and continuously offer him emotional support in which I respect her so much for that._

_I jerked my head when I heard someone called for me downstairs._

_Speak of the devil, father was calling for me._

_Straightening the skirt of my dress, I prepared for the worst for what my father had for in me store. Lately, he had been urging me to be more involved with moneymaking, and it was so ridiculous, I straight up ignored him until I had cooled down. What kind of father would suggest their daughter to use their body to get money? I still have my sense of pride for that, and I refuse to be used as an object in this modern society._

_When I had reached downstairs and turned to the living room, I was livid when I saw someone I hadn’t expected sitting in my very living room as my father sat across him._

_Why on earth my father brought Jesse McCree into this house?_

_“I have someone that wanted to meet you,” my father had said, gesturing his hand towards McCree as he removed his hat and nodded at me curtly. “What’s going on?” I demanded, crossing my arms across my abdomen as I eyed my father to McCree._

_“Mr McCree has come up with a perfect solution to our problems, dear,” my father stood up and approached me, taking my hand and bringing me along to sit down across of McCree as I looked at him puzzled._

_“He’s offered us to clear our debts,” my father announced as I widened my eyes at him. Of course, having a Deadlock member themselves coming down to our house to call off their hunt sounds like a dream together. But nothing comes free that easily, I could smell there’s a catch somewhere between their deals together._

_“And?” I asked, still unfazed from the ‘perfect solution’ my father had thought to_ his _problems. My father was taken aback from my reaction with his plan, as he cleared his throat as he fiddled with his glasses and cleared his throat. “Well—you see, we both had come up, ah—I mean it was,” my father trailed off with his stutters as I sighed tiredly, no wonder he’s a failed businessman; he can’t even complete one sentence._

_“What your daddy is trying to say is,” McCree had suddenly quipped into our conversation as I turned to him and raised my eyebrows. “I had asked him to let me marry you,” he unceremoniously announced and I widened my eyes at him as I turned to my father._

_“And you let him?!” I demanded to my father, who took a deep breath as he looked at me in the eyes. “Think about this, darling,” he said slowly as I sank back into my chair, in disbelief from what had just happened to me. “You and your mother could finally stop working to help me pay our debt—“”_ Your _debt,” I corrected him as I looked at him sharply._

_“W-well, Mr McCree had offered me an opportunity that could save our family for the cost of your hand in marriage,” he tried to coax me but what all I heard was just sounded like complete audible excuses. “And handing over your daughter to Deadlock?!” I said furiously, my nails digging into my palms as I had to contain my anger together._

_“Actually,_ former _Deadlock—I left the gang,” McCree suddenly added as my father and I turned to him in surprise. “Don’t worry—I got all of their loot I could get my hands on, so the deal is still on,” he raised his hands in defence as I gritted my teeth together._

 _“Great, now he’s dragging_ me _being on the run,” I muttered under my breath before I turned to my father. “Mother would never agree to this,” I confidently said, pulling out my last card but he shook his head as I felt realization coming into sense._

_“Your mother had actually allowed him to be your husband,” he announced and I felt lightheaded almost. I couldn’t believe my own mother would give me away, just because of her loyalty to my father, her husband and I felt the tears collected around my eyes as I had decided for myself on my answer._

_“… fine,” I accepted in defeat, hanging my head down low as I let the tears fall down. I could hear McCree’s sighed victoriously as he stood up and crossed the room to my father. “Pleasure working with you, sir—I assume the papers should be…” they started discussing at the other side of the room, as I continued to sob silently now knowing that my days of freedom had been numbered._

_I had never truly appreciated it—I was never one to think about settling down soon enough as my family had been my first priority, but to think that someone had asked for my hand in marriage sounded bizarre almost, when most girls would be excited and finally getting what they had been dreaming of for all of their life._

_A shadow had casted over, as a pair of familiar cowboy boots came into view as I sighed and pulled my head up to face McCree as he looked down at me. “What?” I had asked as he gnawed the inside of his mouth before he sighed._

_“Can I have a seat?” he asked, gesturing the empty seat beside me. I sighed in frustration as I scooted away, letting him have more space. “Go ahead,” I said, crossing my legs on top of the other and rested my crossed arms on them._

_The couch had shifted slightly as McCree took a seat next to me as he leaned forward, resting one of his elbows on his knee as he peered at me. “I take it you’re not happy,” he noticed as I rolled my eyes at him. “In what possibility I would be?” I countered._

_“It’s natural, I understand,” McCree nodded at me as I sighed. “Why me?” I asked him, leaning back on the couch. McCree remained silent, the ticking of the wall clock filled in our silence as I had waited a response from him. “Is liking you a good excuse enough?” he inquired and I turned to him with widened eyes, not expected hearing his sudden confession._

_“Just foolin’ around with you,” he chuckled, as I playfully punch his arm before I looked away. Ever since that night, he had been particularly sweet whenever he saw me in town and wanting to avoid any ideas from the townsfolk, I intentionally disassociate myself with him but that hasn’t stopped him trying to talk to me._

_“It’s going to be alright, lady,” he said, suddenly reaching out to my hand and held it gently as I looked at him. “I promised your daddy I would take good of you,” his finger gently stroked my knuckles as I felt a blush creeping up my cheeks._

_“Which reminds me,” his other hand reached out to something behind me as I leaned forward, curiously wondering what he was keeping from me. “Got you a gift—an engagement gift, if you will,” McCree handed me a small box, a detailed design stamped on the front of the box. Accepting it graciously, I opened it up to see a metal hair comb, a beautiful white rose carved into a piece of metal as I gasped at its beauty._

_“McCree, I can’t possibly—“”It’s yours, lady,” he interrupted, pushing the box towards me as I looked at it again. It’s really pretty, I would admit that but I didn’t have the heart to accept it, because that would actually tie our bonds together unofficially. Sensing my uncertainty, McCree took the hair comb out of the box as he faced me. “May I?” he asked politely, and I was taken aback from his attitude, I just nodded._

_His metal hand combed a part behind my ear, not leaving any stray hairs behind as I flushed under his contact. This is actually my first time to be ever this close with a man, let alone having any physical contact this close it was mostly ground breaking for me._

_Sliding the hair comb on, McCree retracted his hands slowly as he looked at me and a smile tugged on his lips. Standing up and heading towards the mirror that hung in our living room, I was shocked to see how I looked with the hair comb on. Turning my head to the side, it had glistened slightly from the light reflecting on it as I saw McCree heading towards me in the reflection of the mirror._

_“Beautiful,” he commented, smiling at me from the mirror before I turned to him and touched the accessory in my hair. “Thank you, McCree,” I thanked him, giving him a small smile as his hand reached up and held my hand that was still hovering over the hair comb. “I don’t usually believe in nonsense but do you know what the flower means?” McCree suddenly asked as I raised my eyebrows at him._

_“I am worthy of you.”_

* * *

 

The silence was deafening.

Everything stopped in motion.

I felt my heart momentarily stopped.

And here I thought, things were going to get better now that Jesse and I were honest with each other’s feelings until he had dropped the truth bomb on me.

I slumped forward, my hands braced on the floor as I tried to take in the news; tears had already started pooling at the brim of my eyes. My brain had unable to function as I was tried to ease myself, but I wasn’t strong enough—the shock was too much. Unable to hold it, I opened my mouth and let out a devastated scream, letting out the unbearable pain I had voided in my heart as I gripped on the duvet covers.

Jesse sat up, pulling me up and into his embrace as I had wailed uncontrollably into his hold being entrapped in his arms as he let me let it out. Denying reality still, I couldn’t accept the fact that my father, whom I hated so much, was dead. I felt myself trembling as I wrapped my arms around myself as I continued with my wails as Jesse tried his best to calm me down.

This went on, for the next hour or so, Jesse keeping his silence respecting my loss as I stayed quiet.

I thought I hated my father enough, for leaving all of his mess to our family and continuing on making mistakes. Yet, I still didn’t appreciate him enough for trying to patch up his past mistakes, only overlooking his on-going ones. My father, who has provided for my mother and me, was officially gone from this world.

Thoughts filled my head as I thought about my mother. She must be _devastated_ , probably even more than me for losing her husband. She was always loyal to him, though unhappy sometimes with his decisions, she had taken all of her strength to respect him and his choices no matter what the outcome would come.

“When did he…?” I asked, finally breaking the silence and not willing to finish the sentence as Jesse turned to me and sighed. “Yesterday—but I only knew today from the sheriff,” he said to me as I stared down on my hands. “What happened?” I asked again, fear stricken as I prepared for the worst.

“Deadlock happened, that’s what,” he said through gritted teeth as I sat up and faced him. “I thought you had handled the debt with Deadlock?” I asked, eyes narrowed as I raised my voice and begin to doubt him but he shook his head.

“It wasn’t about the debt, that had been settled even before I had come to get you,” he defended himself as I slumped my shoulders down, thought burying into my mind for the possible outcome on why had Deadlock targeted my late father.

“Your daddy was a brave man to face them, darlin’,” Jesse took my hand and enclosed it into his own as he gently rubbed his finger on my knuckles, trying to ease me from my current state of disbelief. “He tried to defend you,” he then explained as my head popped up and looked at him.

He then proceeded on telling me that he was in town, finally getting started on his new business with a new vision and mission in mind and he was determined for it, too. That was when he had overheard a few Deadlock members talk about Jesse, talking shit about him leaving the gang and took all of their loot, too and what piqued his interest was that word of him getting hitched had been the talk around them.

What had made my late father step up to them was when they had mentioned his new wife was a submissive, little whore with worn out holes that Jesse would constantly abuse the hell out of her. Those words had made my late father clicked, he couldn’t bear letting them talk about me like that so he had called them out, telling them to mind their own business.

Of course, Deadlock took it personally and picked him out about it, unsatisfied by the old man suddenly interfering into their noses. But my late father had stood his ground, telling them that Jesse is a respectable man and would treat me like a queen than their wild assumptions.

“Your daddy was wrong—but he became right, too,” Jesse had commented, before continuing on telling on how my late father had met with his fate.

Knowing Deadlock still pissed at Jesse for stealing all of their loot, they assumed that because my late father constant ass kissing toward Jesse made him associated with Jesse. So they took it out on him, beating him to the ground as nobody had stopped to help the helpless old man. But my late father kept strong, he endured the pain—all for protecting Jesse’s and my honour but that still didn’t mean he was indestructible.

After they all had their rounds, and my late father was barely alive that point had the gall to laugh at them, calling them weak for being insecure to someone like Jesse and telling them to stop following someone else’s shadow before he was shot down.

“Who shot him?” I asked, my hands gripping on Jesse’s arm, urging him to go on with his story but his apologetic face was replaced with a scowl.

“Callous Conrad,” his voice like venom when those words left his mouth as I had gasped.

Everyone knew who he was; Callous Conrad, head of Deadlock—public enemy number one, ruthless killer of many including my father.

It must have been a great pleasure for him to show up that day to kill my father for standing up to Jesse—he must’ve felt challenged. Of course, I would, too if all of my assets has been taken from me in one go from a single man. “Of course, he didn’t leave tight lipped,” Jesse suddenly said and I looked at him, puzzled at what he had said.

“He’d left a warning to the sheriff,” he told me and my heart had dropped, as I racked my brain for the possibilities that Callous Conrad could come up with. “He said he wants to settle with me once and for all—at town square in a week,” Jesse finished and I felt the tears coming around again.

“And would you go?” I asked, as if it was a no-brainer when Jesse had hung his head low and sighed. “I have to, sweetheart—who knows what he’ll do if I don’t show up,” he reasoned with me as I let the tears fall and wrapped my arms around him. I had lost my father, I wasn’t ready to lose Jesse now that I loved him like never before.

“But your leg,” I pulled away, glancing down at his bandaged leg as he scoffed at me. “This is just a scratch, sweetheart—I can get right back up in no time,” he assured me but I shook my head, not believing his words as fear overtook my thoughts about his injuries. “I don’t want to lose you,” I caressed his cheek as he held my hand in his and he smiled at me softly, comforting me with his metal hand rubbing my back.

“I have to do this, sugarplum—then maybe the town would be safe again,” I never expected him to have this side of him; Jesse had really wanted to be redeemed again in the public’s eye. The effort he had done to the merchants at Little Rock, turning himself in to the sheriff—he has gone lengths to fight for his honour, and I could never feel more proud.

* * *

 

We both lay next to each other, arms around ourselves as we comforted each other until we didn’t realize that it had been morning. It was hard to take a break and let my eyes rest when I had many things going on in my mind, I pitied Jesse for staying up with me when he’s the one that needed rest the most and I had to be selfish.

Getting up, I brushed the hair off his hair face as I told him to sleep, as I start on breakfast. We decided yesterday that we would go to my old home, visiting my mother just to check how she was holding up and help her with her grief. Jesse had insisted me visiting her, saying that what she needs the most now is her family and I couldn’t say no to that despite his current state. I didn’t want to imagine how she must have felt; the best I could do is distract myself from thinking of the possibilities.

After breakfast, and after getting myself cleaned, I helped Jesse up as he used me as a support to go outside and get Webster. His motorbike had been kept inside the stable, hiding away from any prying eyes coming along our path just to be safe. It took a while for me to help Jesse on to Webster which was funny, considering he’s the one that has helped me up all these times. It took a little more time for myself to get up as Jesse couldn’t help but chuckle at my attempts before I had finally climbed on.

Never have I thought that I would go home under these circumstances. But then again I had never asked Jesse to let me go back home, but that was because I was too afraid he would say no but here we are, under Jesse’s suggestion to go back home.

Once we had reached my old home, it was truly a sight for sore eyes and I felt young again, almost—it was a mixture of feelings, but I had missed this place than I had realized. Climbing off first, followed by helping Jesse down, we both made our way to the front door as we paused together.

I was nervous, that’s for sure—I didn’t know what I should expect as I keep taking deep breaths. Feeling Jesse holding my hand and gripping it, offering comfort as I looked at him and nodded at me, I took my time as I exhaled a long one before I curled my other hand into a fist and rapped onto the door lightly.

It took a few seconds, but my heart dropped when I heard the door being opened from the inside as a frail, aged lady appeared before my eyes. My mother had seen better days, but she has been unkempt—her hair was dishelved, there were bags under her eyes and they were swelling from crying and she was thinner than I had remembered.

“Mother,” I reached my arms out toward her as she leaned and accepted my embrace as she held me tight, leaving no gaps between us when the both of us had started sobbing uncontrollably. There were no words to explain on what has happened, but we both knew—we didn’t need that to understand the situation we were facing.

Breaking off our hug, my mother had noticed Jesse’s presence as she approached him and he took off his hat and held it against his chest. “I’m so sorry for your lost, ma’am, I—“”You! This is because of you!” Jesse didn’t even got to finish his condolences when my mother being hitting him with closed fits as she wailed at him.

Hooking my hands under her arms as I tried to drag her away, Jesse remained there standing still as he looked shocked from my mother’s sudden rage. My mother kept screaming at him; keep blaming him for my late father’s death as I tried to calm her down. “Mother, calm down,” I had tried coaxing her, wrapping my arms around her as she squirmed, still mad at Jesse as he looked down on the floor.

“It’s fine—he’s been great to me,” I tried again and Jesse immediately looked up at me surprisingly, and at least that had made my mother stopped moving as she looked at me with sunken eyes. “It’s been rough the first few days, but he’s been really good to me, mother,” I reassured her as combed my fingers through her hair, comforting her under my touch as she relaxed under my grip. “I was so worried, my love—I thought you were unhappy,” she started to cry, as she rested her head on my shoulder as I continued brushing her hair.

“It turned out okay, mother, there’s nothing to worry about now,” I assured her as she sobbed onto my shoulder. Looking at Jesse, I motioned him to come closer as he did but kept a safe distance between us, respecting my mother’s space between us.

After our little reunion, I went ahead and returned the favour to my mother by cleaning her up starting with a relaxing, hot bath. I had asked Jesse to stay in the living room as I tended my mother, who kept quiet during her little recovery session as I let my hands comfort her. There was something new about my mother’s expression; it shows grief for sure, but also a hint of relief now that she knows of how my marriage with Jesse would bloom out well.

After clothing my mother, I had helped her downstairs and let her sit at the living room with Jesse, telling him to keep my mother company as I went ahead and prepare food for the rest of us. I was wary of leaving Jesse alone with my mother, worried about the time she had tried to let out her anger on him.

I would stick my head out to the living room sometimes, only to see them still quiet with each other and I could feel the dense tension in the air as I quickly finish in the kitchen before I called them both. I bravely asked Jesse to help my mother into the kitchen, as a slow but surely step to let her trust him. His movement was careful due to his injury, but he had helped my mother up from the chair and offered her his arm as she relentlessly took and I could see Jesse tense from her grip.

Never thought I would see the day Jesse would be afraid of my mother, and yet here we are.

After Jesse had succeeded bringing my mother into the kitchen and the plates has been set out on the table, we proceeded on having lunch together as I had to help feed my mother. Jesse took the liberty to start a conversation, in which I had helped keep going on and hoped my mother would join but she would just hum in response, but that was enough for the both of us to acknowledge her acceptance of Jesse.

After lunch, Jesse had offered to clean our dishes in which I had thanked him graciously as I helped my mother back in the living room and I sat with her. “How are you feeling, mother?” I asked, sitting beside her as she leaned back on the chair, the same, empty look still in her eyes.

“I feel like a part of me had died—it won’t be long until my time would come, too,” she said, closing her eyes as got up and knelt in front of her as I gripped her shoulders. “Don’t say that—you still have something to live for,” I shook her lightly, scared for my life for what she had said as I became worried.

“What’s the point? You’re father isn’t here anymore,” she said flatly and I pulled her into a hug. “But this isn’t what father would want, too,” I said as tears trailing down my cheeks, and my mother stiffed from the mention of my late father. “Father didn’t go his way to clear his debt, handing me over just for you to give up easily,” I pulled away and said to her.

“He was going to make things right for our family, and we should live on for that,” I advised and I couldn’t believe myself for fighting for my late father, I felt like a hypocrite as the words left my mouth but it was all to comfort my mother, who had lost all hope in this world when there was more worth living for.

“And… and Jesse’s going to make it right, too,” I recalled from our conversation yesterday, and my mother looked at me as she widened her eyes. “He’s going to fight for father, as he did for me,” I pulled my mother into another embraced. Feeling my mother turned her head, I craned my head behind my shoulder as I saw Jesse standing at the kitchen door, not knowing what to do when we had a little moment together.

“Come here,” my mother had motioned for him to come, as he was startled by her and started limping towards us as I got up and helped him. My mother stood up from her chair when the both of us had reached in front of her, and she looked at Jesse with a hint of determination in her eyes.

“Don’t fail me now, son,” she said sharply as Jesse stiffened and I could see his Adam’s apple bobbed and heard him gulp. “And don’t let my daughter down, as well,” my mother said, before putting her hands on his shoulders and pulled him down into a hug. Jesse staggered a bit from their position, being taller than the both of us as he awkwardly hugged my mother back, relaxing a bit now that she had started to trust him.

* * *

 

When it was nightfall, and we had dinner already, Jesse and I were in my old bedroom, after I had tucked my mother in bed and waited for her to sleep, seeing that she hasn’t had any for the past day since the passing of my father. Jesse looked better than yesterday, but he still had the injury on his leg that had made his moves slow.

I had let Jesse rest on the bed after I had cleaned him up as well, no matter how inappropriate it was with my mother in the house but I kept cool, and Jesse was nice enough not to tease me during the whole process as I had been blushing profusely.

After getting myself cleaned as well, Jesse sat up on bed with his back leaning on the headboard as he seem deep in thought. Crossing the room to him, and let myself have a seat at the small space there was at his chest. “Penny for your thoughts?” I asked, breaking his trance when he realized I had sat in front of him and gave me a small smile.

“It’s a weird feeling right now, that’s all,” he just said as he grabbed my hand and held it as I gripped lightly. “First, you accepted me as a person—and now your mother,” Jesse stated followed by a light chuckle and I gave him a small smile. “You’re forgetting something,” I said as I pressed a finger on the tip of his nose and he looked at me confusingly.

“The people of Little Rock—Joe, Terry, everyone had accepted you,” I listed out and Jesse looked at me wide eyed. “Soon enough, the whole town would accept you once more,” I cupped his cheek and grazed a finger against his beard and he smiled at me sweetly.

“How could I forget?” he said before he pulled me into an embrace and scooted to the centre of the bed, leaving enough space for the both of us as we wrapped around our bodies together. “But I would have never gotten this far without your kindness,” he said as he placed soft kisses on head and I smiled back at him. In our current position, I had suddenly gotten a light bulb and I had gasped in surprise.

“Hey, Jesse,” I started, placing a hand on his chest as he looked down on me and raised his eyebrows.

“Do you like babies?” I asked bravely, and his eyes instantly widened and his cheeks were suddenly flushed from my suggestion. “I-I can’t say that I do sugar, but I don’t think I would mind if it was mine,” he stammered and I let out a laugh. “Why are you asking?” he avoided looking at me, opting to look at something interesting around my room.

“I was thinking,” I said with a little smile, with a finger trailing along the shape of his pectorals of his chest as I felt him stiffened.

“Would you like to have one?”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My fave chapter because mom beats the shit out of Jesse.

Jesse couldn’t look more surprised from my sudden suggestion. It was hard for me not to hold a laugh not when I’ve seen him being flustered for the first time. My fingers continued to trace along the shape of his pectoral and he just shuddered from my touch and oh—that just want me to go on _forever_ with this.

“A-Are you sure, darlin’?” he asked, finally meeting my eyes but there’s still uncertainty in his eyes, probably not believing his ears. Getting up, I slung my legs around him until I was straddling his hips and Jesse gotten more surprised than he already was as he called my name questioningly. My hands were placed on his shoulders, pushing him down out of reflex—I can’t believe myself at what I was going to do to him but there’s no stopping now.

Leaning forward, I pressed a deep kiss on his lips as he groaned from the contact of our lips together. It was nice, long and full of sensuality that made me brave enough to slip my tongue into his mouth as we tasted each other and our tongues spearing each other. His mechanic arm pressed on my back, bringing us closer together to deepen our kiss as I lightly grounded our hips together, and felt the straining in his pants and Jesse let out a groan.

“Careful darlin’, you don’t want to wake your mother,” Jesse smirked, his robotic hand trailing down my back as he lightly cupped my ass and I let out a shaky breath from the sudden contact of his cool, metal hand. “It’s fine—she’s a deep sleeper,” I assured, placing kisses down his jaw as he helpfully craned his neck letting me have the easier access to his neck as he let his hands wandered under my nightgown and I shuddered from the light trail of his fingers and it was my turn to let out lewd noises.

When his hands trailed up my back, Jesse smirked at me as I continued placing light kisses down his neck, now reaching his collarbones. “No bra? How convenient,” he quipped and he pulled his hand out of my gown to unbutton the front of my gown as he let it slid down my shoulders, my nipples hardened after feeling the cold air in the room as he took one into his hands and massaged it gently.

“It’s uncomfortable wearing one to sleep at night,” I defended scratchily from his touch but two could play at this game; slithering my hands under his top as I felt the curves of his body that tensed under my touch until I reached where his pectorals and I thumbed his nipples instantly which earned a moan from Jesse.

“No worries, sweetheart—I’ll make sure we’re both not going to wear anything tonight,” he said in a low growl and suddenly everything happened too fast, I couldn’t keep up from what just happened. I startled myself when my back was suddenly met with the soft material of the bed and Jesse pinned me down as his eyes were clouded with lust. It was all too familiar—especially the look in his eyes and our current position, it had reminded me on our wedding day.

It only made our matters worse when he kissed me hungrily and I felt myself panicked from the all too familiar setting as I pushed Jesse away and felt the tears brimming around my eyes. Jesse was caught off guard, too—probably disappointed from my reluctance out of nowhere. “Baby, you okay?” he asked softly, his eyes looked more concerned now and that calmed me down a bit, but the feeling was still there.

“I… I’m sorry, Jesse—I’m still scared,” I admitted, closing my eyes as the tears fell down. Of course, I loved this man in front of me, and I know he loves me very much as well but still, it made me think back about the times he forced me into something I didn’t liked.

I thought I trusted him enough to not let those repeat again, but my body and mind had learned the hard way when dealing with our intimate advances that it just lets out big warning signs in my head whenever we’re affectionate with each other.

“Hey, it’s okay, pumpkin,” Jesse cooed, his real hand wiped away my tears. Jesse got off of me and sat up, prompting me to do the same and pulled me into an embrace as I lightly sobbed into his chest. His robotic hand carefully wrapped around my waist as his other hand rubbed light circles around my back to calm me down. “We don’t have to do deed now—not when you’re still afraid of me,” he assured, his chin rested on the top of my hand.

“I’m sorry again for making you traumatized,” Jesse apologized, as he pulled me away from him and we looked at each other. “I want you to take the time all you want, sweetheart—I’m not going anywhere,” his hand was removed from my waist and he buttoned my gown back. Jesse leaned forward and left kisses on my forehead, nose and pecked my lips lightly, a hand trailed down my hair to tuck a hair behind my ear.

Jesse helped me lay back down on the bed, and I felt scared suddenly when he got up from the bed. I really need to get myself straight because I couldn’t decide if I was actually afraid of my husband, or afraid of his touch. Relief returned to my thoughts when he only got up to close the lights before climbing back into bed with me, but keeping a distance between us.

I was still touch starved, and the many things that I had liked Jesse about was that he was a great cuddle buddy—regardless of the things he had done to me. Turning to him, I reached out to him and wrapped my arms around his wide frame to bring ourselves closer. Jesse smiled down at me as he wrapped his arms around my waist and I nestled in between his chest.

“I love you, you know that?” Jesse suddenly said and I looked up at him and gave him a smile.

“I love you, too.”

* * *

 

Waking up was the most familiar feeling to me, what more being back in my room again in which I had never envisioned to see again. But it was different now, I had a husband to sleep with and it wasn’t bad to be in an embrace and the first thing I saw when I opened my eyes was the calm, resting face of Jesse who was snoring, but not as loud as before.

Peeling myself from his embrace, I hummed lightly at the familiar feeling of the wooden floors when I stepped out of bed. It was still a little dark outside, but the sun had certainly rose as I made outside my room. Taking light steps to my mother’s room, I frowned at the sight of her being curled into a small ball making her look frail than she already was. She was hugging my late father’s pillow close to her body, almost want to make it one with her body.

Fear had suddenly filled my thoughts when I had realized that the day in which Jesse was supposed to face Callous Conrad was a week away, and I don’t know if Jesse could get better enough from his current injuries. What if Jesse didn’t have what it takes to take down Conrad?

What if Jesse _failed_ to deter Deadlock from our town? Would we all still be living in fear and nobody would step up?

What if I _lose_ him? Would I end up like my mother?

I couldn’t stop thinking about the ‘what if’s’ that had filled my mind more, I didn’t realize that I was crying until I felt tears coming down my cheeks. I had slumped down on the floor, my hand held onto the frame of the door to my parent’s bedroom and my other hand was covering my mouth as I had sobbed from the haunting thoughts in my mind.

“Darling?” I heard my mother’s soft voice called out to me when I looked up and saw her sitting up from her bed. I sniffed as I wiped away my tears with my hands and I got up, knees shaking as I made my way to my mother and letting her envelop me into a hug. “Is something wrong?” she sounded concerned, of course—who wouldn’t when they saw their daughter crying their eyes out.

“I’m scared… what if Jesse ends up like father?” I shared my fear with her as she hushed me and rubbed my back, comforting me. “No, darling—in this situation you must trust him, especially when he’s fighting for our family,” my mother advised and I pulled away slightly to look at her and tried to find the words to say to her.

“… Like you trusted father even for the mistakes he had done?” I carefully asked, arranging my words carefully not to offend her enough and she gave me a sad smile. “I had my doubts, too—like you’re having right now,” my mother wiped off the remaining tears on my face. “I was scared, too—I got worried everyday thinking of our problems, I was afraid that I didn’t give you proper meals.”

“But I still trusted your father, because you know why, my dear?” she let me wondered until I gave up and shook my head. “Because if he didn’t care to fix our family, he would’ve left us,” my mother revealed and I felt the tears coming back now.

Once again I was blinded by my father’s efforts that I didn’t take into account. All I ever cared was physical improvement, collecting profit from our small business together, I hadn’t realized that he had been _trying_ all along. I never imagined him walking out on us, leaving his debt to my mother and me as we work ourselves to our bone. I wish I had seen it before, I wish I had thanked him enough for at least not leaving us and for not betraying mother.

I buried my face into the crook of my mother’s neck as I wailed, it still hurts thinking back to my late father now that everything has come into perfect view now. My mother rocked our bodies together, hushing me as she let me cry it out but I still felt like I wasn’t being honest with my mother.

It might jeopardize my marriage with Jesse, but my mother had the right to know, of all many people she had to know the most. Forcing myself to stop crying, I pulled away and trying to regain composure, I looked at my mother right in the eyes and she looked at me, pitiful almost from my current condition.

“I… I have something to tell you about Jesse,” I started, and I felt my stomach tightened as I tried to have courage in what I was trying to tell mother. “What is it sweetheart?” she sounded more concerned now, there was a look of fear of the unknown written in her eyes as I took deep breaths and dug my nails into my palms.

“He forced me, when I wasn’t ready” I finally let it out, barely a whisper but my mother heard it loud and clear as her eyes widened and you could hear a pin drop in the room.

“Just once?” there was urgency in her tone, her hands roamed on my arms, trying to find injuries from the impact. “T-Twice,” I truthfully said and she instantly looked as if death was knocking on our door. She pulled me into an embrace again, and it was for her turn to cry but I patted her back comfortingly.

When she pulled back, there was rage in her eyes.

This wasn’t good.

“That son of a bitch bastard!” she cursed out and I was taken aback from her sudden breakdown. Never in my life I would hear those foul words coming out of her mouth and this was coming from my mother, who was the closest thing an old fashioned lady would come around.

She tried to get off the bed, but I braced my hands on her arms and forced her to stay put. “M-mother, wait—please,” I tried to coax, but she was still trying to get out of bed and I was worried for my life in what she was going to do to Jesse and he couldn’t exactly fight her back. “It’s fine—I trust him now, just like you said,” I said but she didn’t heed what I was trying to say.

“I know what I said, but not when he had hurt you!” she scolded and I flinched, it was rare for her to let out her anger on me as well. “I don’t forgive the things he did to me, too—but he’s changed, mother I swear!” I tried reassuring her but she still struggled under my grasp.

“I’m going to get him—I’m going to hurt him twice than he had hurt you,” my mother threatened through gritted teeth and I threw my arms around her trying to stop her from raging out her anger. “Mother, please—I love him!” I claimed and she suddenly stopped her movements upon hearing from my sudden confession.

“D-Do you really, my dear?” she asked, her arms limps on the side of her body as I cradled her into my embrace. “I do, mother—I do love him,” I confirmed back, resting my chin on her shoulder as she started to sob. “But he hurt you!” she exclaimed but I shook my head.

“I know what he did was wrong mother, I hate him for that, too,” I assured her that I didn’t enjoy the things that Jesse had done to me, but it was behind all of us right now. “But I grew to love him, as he did for me,” my hand combed down her graying hair as she continued to sob on my shoulder. “H-He loves you, too?” my mother asked shakily and I smiled at the thought, remembering the first time when Jesse confessed his feelings to me.

“As much as I do love him,” I pulled back and wiped off my mother’s tears from her face. “I just want to make sure you’re happy, my dear,” she still shook her head, not approving of my current state with Jesse. “It’s going to be happy now, mother,” I tucked a hair behind her ear and pressed a kiss on her forehead. “He promised, on our wedding day,” I remembered, when Jesse had vowed to give it his all to make me happy.

“… Am I interrupting something?” Jesse drawled as he limped towards my parent’s bedroom, still looking fazed from his slumber. Not realizing that I had let my guard down, my mother slipped off of bed and approached him. And before I could stop her, my mother let out a loud grunt as she smacked Jesse right in the face that was hard enough for him to stumble back on the floor and I quickly got up from the bed, concerned for his injury.

“Ma’am?!” Jesse cupped his smacked cheek as he looked at my mother in bewilderment. “That’s for hurting my daughter,” I heard my mother said through gritted teeth and Jesse’s eyes turned soulless now that he had realized his mistakes his done to me and before I could go to him, my mother raised her arm ordering me to stop in my tracks. It wasn’t long until mother gave another loud and hard smack on the other side of his face as Jesse let out a menacing groan from the pain.

“That’s for hurting her, _again_ ,” she sneered before stepping away behind him and I finally got to help him sit up as he stared off. “Are you alright?” I quickly slung his arm around my shoulder and tried to help him stand but he wasn’t being very cooperative as he became limp suddenly.

“Treat her right this time—she’s not being raised to be a lady for nothing,” my mother stood at the top of the stairs before disappearing downstairs.

* * *

 

Jesse, of course, had shown a softer side when it came to my mother.

After regaining his composure, he couldn’t stop apologizing to my mother about his mistakes and promised many things to take care of me better even though she had accepted him to love me, Jesse still doesn’t know about that so she still keeps playing on her little game and I couldn’t help but to feel sorry for Jesse.

What really took the cake was during after breakfast, my mother sat at one of the armchairs in the living room and Jesse kneeled before her, head still held up high as he apologized profusely to her but she still kept a tight lip around him. What made my mother finally convinced was when he truly kneeled, his hands on the floor with his head pressing down on the wood as he continued his strings of apologies and I rolled my eyes at the sight of my mother finally smiled at him triumphantly.

“Raise your head, boy,” she called out to him, and Jesse slowly got up from his stance, on his knees still as he looked at her with hopeful eyes. “ _Don’t_ disappoint me, ever again,” she snapped and you could see the little boy in Jesse when he had reacted positively. “Thank you so much, ma’am—I promise to cherish your daughter more than my life, swear it on my left arm!” he held up his robotic arm but my mother shook her head.

“Just take care of her like a queen—and she’ll make you feel like a king,” my mother advised, her eyes following me and I nodded at her as I smiled. Approaching my husband, I helped him up and dusted off the specks on his shoulders and knees as he looked down on me lovingly.

“I worship the ground she walks on,” Jesse said still looking at me and I smiled at his sudden thoughtfulness. Standing on my tiptoes, I reached up for a kiss and he generously returns it but kept in my mind that my mother was still in the room, so he kept it sweet and short. When we turned to my mother, she smiled at us gently and my heart fluttered now that we truly are one family.

* * *

 

“Best be off now, ma’am,” Jesse remarked as I climbed onto Webster and faced my mother, who was standing at the porch of the front door. My mother assured that she could take care of herself now that her worries has dissipated and puts her trust on Jesse that he could take care of me. “Good luck on the dreaded day,” my mother wished light-heartedly, confident almost knowing that Jesse would win.

“Give them the ass kicking they deserve,” my mother encouraged him and Jesse widened his eyes. Of course, everyone was shocked when my mother had suddenly used brute words even myself didn’t know she had it in her. “All for you, ma’am,” he tipped his hat at her.

“Also, I’m expecting grandchildren when you both get back,” she suddenly said and I exchanged glances with Jesse as I felt heat rushing through my cheeks. “W-We talked about that last night, so don’t worry about it,” Jesse flailed his hand and I became more flustered when he admitted it to my mother.

Once we bid our goodbyes, I whipped the reins on the horse as Webster started moving to take us home. “I knew your family was posh, _too posh_ for this part around town but—she still takes etiquette and those fancy stuff seriously when she could easily take down Deadlock if she wanted to,” Jesse commented now that we were far enough from my house and I had let out a chuckle.

“Of course, my great-grandparents had their reputation here so it lives out to us now, even for me—I enjoy it greatly, actually,” I admitted, recalling all the lessons I had when I was younger at that very house in which my grandmother had patiently tutored me to.

“I like it, too—makes me feel like marrying to royalty,” Jesse kissed the back of my head as I smiled to myself.

Following Jesse’s instruction to the way back to our house, tragedy suddenly struck us when a loud gunshot sounded behind us and before we knew it, Webster had been spooked terribly and stumbled down on the path causing us to be thrown off the horse, and we landed roughly on the rocky terrain of our path. My attention instantly turned to Jesse, who was groaning painfully on the ground as he gripped on his injured leg and he was braced by Webster, who was trying to gallop but was lying at its side.

“Jesse, are you—ah!” I was suddenly lifted off the ground and felt like I was placed onto someone’s shoulder like a sack of potatoes. When I craned my head to see who it was, blood drained out of my face when my eyes met with Callous Conrad, who looked at me tantalizingly with his dirty smirk plastered on his face.

“Pleased to meet ya, girly,” he greeted me as I fought in his grasp but it was firm enough to not let me go, and the pain that ached my body from the impact before didn’t seem to help either. Jesse was screaming out my name, trying to push Webster away but it was because it was still moving frantically making it harder as Jesse was pinned down by it.

“Let me go!” I hit his back with closed fists but he turned around, making me face Jesse who was still struggling with his current situation. “Let’s settle this once and for all, McCree,” Conrad craned his head behind his shoulder as Jesse continued to scream out for me as I did for him.

“You know where to find me—town square, three—no, make that _two_ days, from now,” he challenged calmly, his voice eerily filled my head as I continued to move in his grasp but to no avail.

Starting to walk away, I reached out my arms towards Jesse as he tried to get up and limped towards me only to fall back down, unavailable to sustain with his injury.

And my names left his lips in a loud scream as I was being dragged off.


	9. Chapter 9

Did someone place a tonne of bricks on my head when I fell asleep or is this headache killing me slowly?

Not only that, but my whole body ached terribly and not to mention uncomfortable position I was in.

Wait, something’s not right.

Where was I before this? I need to retrace a few things back.

Fluttering my eyes open, it was dark—but not pitch black enough for me to make out a few things littered around the dingy room and the smell is _unbearable_ , how does someone live in a place like this? My body felt heavy, that’s when I realized that the rest of my body had numbed meaning that I’ve been here in this position longer than I liked. Attempting to move my limbs, I was tied down to a chair, my hands behind my back and my legs tied to the legs of the chair—but why? Why can’t I remember anything?

Closing my eyes, I tried to remember what happened before I blacked out.

I remember my mother, she was devastated—but for what? Where was father, why won’t he—oh.

Father had died, in the hands of Deadlock.

How did I know that? Someone told me, someone close, someone I loved?

Did I love someone? I did, very much—I remember his charming voice, his suave demeanour—his cowboy hat.

_Cowboy…_

“Jesse!” I called out, as everything that had happened finally came into memory. Conrad, ambushed us—took me as a prisoner, and Jesse was all left alone and hurt. I started crying uncontrollably, thinking about my fate and what had happened to Jesse. How long has time passed? Has it been two days already or had I missed everything and I am forever a Deadlock prisoner?

But Jesse—oh God, I couldn’t stop thinking about him.

Did he manage to get up and get himself treated or was he left there to die, with no one to fight back Deadlock?

Fear had overcome me when a door had opened in front of me, the light from the outside had blinded me as I squinted when I saw a tall, dark form appeared in the doorway and I had come to realize that it was Callous Conrad, right before my eyes.

I’ve only seen him from afar all these times, and I had efficiently avoided him whenever I’m in town and thankfully, we never came to each other’s paths and I intended to keep it that way.

Closing the door behind him, he crossed the room towards me and there was an unsettling air around him that made the room’s temperature dropped and if my legs weren’t tied down, he would’ve seen them shaking in fear. Pulling a beaded string, a lightbulb had shine and I had a better look of his face now as he could see the fear in my eyes more clearly.

He looked more menacing up front, a scowl was always plastered on his face. His hat emphasized how slim his whole body frame was, it was almost unbelievable that this man was the head of Deadlock. Lighting up a cigarillo, he bent down until he was at the same eye level with me, our gaze not breaking each other as he inhaled and puffed out smoke in my face and I had coughed, turning my head away from him.

“McCree’s girl, huh?” his voice was calm, but there was still a bite to it—it was like listening to a snake hissing. Callous Conrad’s eyes trailed up and down my tied up body, making me feel disgusted by my abductor as I squirmed, trying to shy my body away from him but the roped didn’t help. “No, you’re that old man’s daughter first,” he had suddenly recognized and I widened my eyes at him.

“’Course, guess he didn’t get to see the day his deal with McCree ends up in ashes,” he took another whiff of his cigar and puffed out in my face as I tried to close my eyes from keeping them burning my eyeballs. “Screw you, Conrad,” I bravely said but he just chuckled.

“Getting cocky there, girlie?” he smirked at me dirtily, drawing his cigar out of his mouth and tapped it onto the floor. “That bastard McCree—thinking he could get away with our loot,” he started muttering to himself, biting his cigar back as I was forced to listen.

“One day he said he wants to move our loot to a more secure location, the next day I got news he had ran away with everything we worked hard for,” Conrad trailed off, but I was too distracted by the fact that they all trusted Jesse too much, they can’t be serious to let him go his way that easily. “Then he had paid your old man all of his debt, when we were paid to get him.”

“That son of bitch thinks he can play hero—but I know deep down, he’s still Deadlock inside and out,” he chuckled as I looked at him puzzled. “Taking you as his little wife had proven it, too—bet you didn’t like the way he forced on you, too,” he guessed as I bit my tongue. He’s not wrong, but I didn’t want to admit that in front of him—not when I have to trust Jesse with all of my life.

“Y-You’re wrong, Conrad,” I denied, sitting up straight from my restrains. “Jesse loves me very much,” I countered, and that was the truth, too. I don’t care what would Conrad assume of my relationship with Jesse, but for all that matters—we love each other, and I don’t want to let him be branded by who he was when he was still a part of Deadlock.

But Conrad just let out a loud chortle from my sudden outburst, not believing his ears that a man like Jesse was capable of love. “Anyone can love, girlie—not limited to a person; it could be money, power… guns, life’s too short to settle on loving just one lady,” he sneered at me as I furrowed my brows at him.

“Just because you don’t have someone to love, doesn’t mean you could say the same thing about McCree, _Clueless_ Conrad,” I mocked him, and he looked surprise from my sudden chirp about his name, but his eyes were easily replaced with rage.

In a speed of light, he heeled his boot on my shoulder as I let out a cry of pain, Conrad peered into me closely until our faces were close I could see the red veins in his eyes as I tried to peer away from him.

“That’s _Callous_ Conrad, you little whore—don’t you ever forget that,” he said sternly as I cringed from the stinking breath of his. “And I loved someone once—still regret the day when she’d left,” he commented, as he grabbed my chin and forced me to look at him in the eyes.

“You want to see McCree so much, don’t worry—you’ll get front row seats,” he sneered at me as I clenched my jaw together, not showing him any fear but it was hard not when this man had threatened the life out of you. “And I’ll make sure his death would be slow as possible, and you get to catch every minute of it,” he pushed me away making my chair rocked lightly before I managed to stable it.

“Be on your toes, girlie—you’re in for a treat,” Conrad had the last laugh before he leaved me in the room alone, letting me cry again as I felt the unbearable fear of what’s to come.

* * *

 

Time went by like a snail in summer heat—extremely dreadful to deal with but even then, my heart can’t pound hard and loud enough as I had expected someone to barge into that door to drag me out and watch the demise of my husband, Jesse McCree.

When that did happen though, it was one of Deadlock’s lackeys that came to fetch me. Untying my legs and forced me out, it took a while for me to start walking again being in that chair for God knows how long but it was a hassle to get me to town square.

Coming out from Deadlock’s current hideaway, it was a long way until I remember the outskirts of the town, and when the town came into view—I couldn’t get more scared of what’s to come, my heart felt like it would come out anytime.

At the sudden arrival of Deadlock, the whole town was slowly being under a spell, as a sheet of silence had been laid and hushed voices behind closed doors sounded, knowing that the dreaded day has finally arrive, the final showdown between Deadlock and Jesse McCree once and for all.

Shops that were just open for business hastily turned their signs, closing down their front as they all quiver in fear at the presence of Deadlock, well—at the presence of Conrad that is. Seeing Deadlock in this town isn’t rare and you just need to know not to mess with them, just keep your hair out of them and they remain avoidable and Conrad isn’t always seen here unless the patrol was around but even they’re afraid of him. Whenever he’s in town, the whole place completely transforms into a ghost town, rarely a shop would welcome him inside unless by force which happens all the time.

Reaching the town square, the city hall being the centre of it all and the buildings that surrounds it are just the post office, the sheriff’s office and the bank. It was convenient, but it was a bit hard to reach here since my home was still far away from town square. Feeling a rough hand on my forearm, Conrad dragged me out of the cart and forced me to stand beside him, as he glanced at the giant clock at the tower of the city hall.

“Any minute now, but if he doesn’t show up—well, I guess you could always be _my little wife_ ,” Conrad gazed at me, I could feel his eyes roamed my body as I shivered at the thought of this man getting his hands on me. His face was approximately close to mine, and without thinking twice, I headbutt him hard right in the chin and while he and his men was distracted, I quickly dashed away—taking all of my energy to get away from them, not looking back once as they started shouting about me getting away.

My hands were still tied behind my back but I still won’t let that stop me as I had dashed through the corners of the building until I know I was at least far away from them. But I couldn’t stay long—they were on their toes trying to capture me again. Panting, my eyes quickly scanned the area, trying to find something, _anything_ that can be used to get me out of these ropes.

I thought I heard someone hissed at me, and I craned my head around trying to find the source until I saw someone familiar hiding behind the door. “Terry!” I had quietly quipped as I made my way to him as quickly as I could and he let me in. “Heard about the showdown, can’t miss that,” he said quickly as he helped me out of my restraints hastily. “How’d you know?” I turned and asked him, until I remembered something more important.

“Wait, have you heard anything about Jesse?” I gripped his shoulders and demanded but he held up his hands, trying to calm me down. “Don’t worry, I found him just in time—he’s here, lady and he’s coming to get you,” he assured, and suddenly I felt a load being lifted off my back when he had said that.

I slumped forward, a sigh of relief left my lips as I thought to Jesse.

“He’s okay,” I said to myself, a hand placed on my chest as I tried to steady my pacing heartbeat. I smiled at the thought of him, seeing him again with his big smile that can light up my world and being in his embrace that could envelop me wholly. I just can’t wait to be with him again, even if we both don’t know that we could make it out today dead or alive, I would die as long as I was with him.

“Wait, where is he?” I just remembered about Deadlock, and asked Terry but he shook his head. “Don’t worry, lady—he’s gotten all of this planned, we just need to follow what he’s told us,” Terry assured me and I raised my eyebrows at him. “Us?” I repeated him and he just smiled at me and nodded. “You’ll see, come on,” Terry started moving and I followed him mindlessly.

Leading me into the building, I only recognized it as one of the general stores in town when I saw the owner who was holding a gun in his hands, guarding and ready to fight if any Deadlock got into their perimeter. The owner then passed Terry his own gun, a smaller one than the one he was holding but I began doubting his skill. “Can you shoot?” I then asked him but he just let out a laugh. “You wound me, lady,” he just said as he continued to lead me through the store front.

Checking to see if the coast is clear, Terry craned his head at the slightly ajar door, waving at me to signal that it’s fine to move. Quickly on our feet, we trudged together alongside the adjacent of the general store away from townsquare when suddenly, the stack of boxes in front of us were shot by a rain of bullets. I yelped in surprise when Terry pulled me behind him as he started firing away with his gun.

“Go to the saloon, Joe’s meeting you there!” Terry said without looking back, and without hesitation I moved my feet and carried myself away from the scene. Along the way, I avoided the swarming Deadlock members barely enough but it was still a long way to go until I reached the saloon. It was hard to take a shortcut when some paths were occupied by people that were trying to shoot me down but I managed to scrape by their bullets. Of course, I spoke to soon when I stumbled back onto the ground when I missed a bullet right in front of me _barely_ touching me.

Looking at the source from the shooter, a grimy, Deadlock member—I don’t even recognize who—approached me slowly, as I crawled backwards away from him, I could smell death just a whiff away as I crunched my eyes closed. This was it—this is my end and I’m never going to see Jesse again and I never did tell him how I loved him so.

A shot rang out, but I didn’t feel any pain whatsoever. Opening my eyes, my assaulter was down on the ground, and when I looked up to see who killed him—my heart soared instantly.

There he was, in all his glory, Jesse McCree himself aiming a gun, his iconic six-shooter that I’ve heard countless times when he brags about it, but I take it. When our eyes met, I felt myself melting when I saw his deep, brown eyes again and I felt myself on the verge of tears.

I was embarrassed almost, letting him see myself in this state—all ragged up than being all proper and prim usually in his eyes. I smiled at him softly, and so did he but when he opened his mouth to say something, a shot rang out close by and he immediately turned to the direction of it. Looking back at me, I nodded at him, urging for him to go—I could see that he wanted to stay, his feet firmly planted on the ground as he hesitated to leave me.

His attention was quickly averted by another shot close by, looking back at me one more time as he was ready to get a move on, I looked at him and smiled at him, assuring him that I would be fine. The edge of his mouth tugged higher into a smirk, he tipped his hat at me before he turned around, his red serape flicked behind him as I stood up from the ground and trailed behind him slowly as I watched his back, making his way to settle this once and for all.

“Make me proud, cowboy,” I said to myself, my hand clutching together on my chest, where my heart was. With haste, I took the gun that was from the dead member before and made my way to the saloon. Did I ever learn to shoot a gun before? No, but it’s what confidence that matters when you’re holding one. Looks can be very deceiving when you have a firearm ready by your side, only an experienced shooter knows when you’re doing it wrong but this is Deadlock we’re talking about here—they only take pointers and I’m pretty sure they don’t take classes at the sheriff’s office.

Seeing the familiar archway of the saloon, I made my turn to their backdoor which had Joe, waiting for me as he ushered me inside. “Sorry we have to meet again under these circumstances, lady,” Joe apologized as he brought me deep into the saloon.

“What are we actually going to _do_ here, Joe?” I asked him, weaving through the corridors as I lifted up the hem of my skirt carefully not to trudge down by stepping on the fabric.

“McCree’s going to have Conrad cornered—our job is to eliminate those in the way, or distract them almost while we single Conrad out,” Joe explained and when we finally reach the front of the saloon, Deadlock members came in crashing through the doors and started firing.

Crouching down behind the bar, Joe opened fire and dodged a few bullets in our way. “Go to the other side, I’ll be right there!” Joe said and I instantly stood up, crouching still as I moved to the other side of the room and away from the gunshots. I stopped in my tracks when I heard Joe let out a painful groan and I instantly turned around to see Joe unconscious on the floor, blood coming out of his right shoulder.

“Joe!” I tried to stalk my way back until something blunt hit the back of my head.

And everything turned black.

Muttering out a groan, I fluttered my eyes open and realized that I was on the floor, my hands tied behind my back. When I sat up, my movements immediately stopped when a felt the glock of the gun pressed behind my head. “Don’t get any ideas, missy,” my captor said through gritted teeth as my breath became short. Looking forward, my breath hitched when I saw Callous Conrad being backed up underneath the water tank as I heard the familiar spurs of Jesse.

“Got you cornered, Conrad—it’s time to end this once and for all,” Jesse’s gruff voice sounded somewhere behind the building, but he was in front of Conrad that’s for sure. Conrad just gave him a smirk before spitting on the ground next to him, he then took out his gun and turned his head my way, before nudging his head to one of his lackeys and I was suddenly being stood up forcefully by a harsh hand on my forearm as I struggled in his grip.

“That maybe the case—but I still got your girl,” Conrad then said confidently as I was dragged to him by one of his goons and had me on a headlock as I got close to him. Jesse halted in his steps and shouted out my name, unexpected for him to see me captured again.

“I’ll let you on easy, McCree,” Conrad twirled his gun on his other hand as I tried to pry away from his arm, but pulled me closer when I did start struggling. “You either come back to the gang and keep your wife or,” he pressed the head of the gun beside my temple as I hitched my breath. “The only one that gets to walk out of this alive is going to be me,” he pressed the gun to my temple harder as I looked at Jesse, who had a harsh look on his face as his eyes wandered to and fro at Conrad and I.

“Jesse, don’t listen to him!” I managed to cough out but Conrad’s grip on me tightened as he snarled at Jesse. “Make your choice, McCree—time’s ticking,” and it was, the large clock at city hall ticked loudly as it synchronized with the beat of my heart, as I watched Jesse twitched his hands, his Peacekeeper in his holster as Conrad kept the gun on my head, and never breaking eye contact with Jesse.

Peering around, the situation was now flipped with Jesse now being cornered as the remaining lackeys of Deadlock loomed around the perimeter, their guns and rifles ready to fire at any movement from Jesse. Jesse’s eyes wandered around, counting how many there are and obviously, he was outnumbered with his six bullets.

Closing my eyes, the tears started to fall as I recall back everything of my memories with Jesse. From the day when we first met, when we first kissed and the day he told me that he loved me. There were a few bumps along our marriage, bumps that I won’t forgive him for but trust him well enough not to do it again. All of this happened, because I happen to show him kindness when nobody else would.

Opening my eyes back again to see him for the last time, I couldn’t help but to smile a little seeing him getting all worked up to save little old me, a prude and uptight lady who has changed for the better, all for him.

Hearing the last ticks of the clock, I pressed my eyes close again as I waited for his decision. Maybe dying together isn’t so bad after all.

Hearing the clock striked noon, Jesse instantly reached out for his gun as he shot five of the Deadlock members down and when he pointed his gun towards us, my heart stopped out of fear that he would miss shooting Conrad and got me instead. But then he pointed his gun higher, aiming the water tank behind us and shoot his last bullet on one of its legs down as Conrad let out a victorious laugh.

“Ha! You missed, McCree,” he spoke to soon when he heard the creaking noise of metal coming down behind him as he craned his neck to see the water tank coming down on him as I stepped on his foot with all of my force. With him being distracted, I made a run towards Jesse as he finally embraced me, finally being in his arms once again as we looked at Conrad’s last moments before he was being crushed down by the water tank as it spilled it’s waves of water towards us and flushed us along with the tide.

Once the water subsided, I was still in Jesse’s embrace as we laid down together on the ground, his hand on the small of my back keeping me in his arms as I sat up and smiled at him. Brushing away my dampen hair from my face, his metal hand caressed my cheek as I sink into his touch and looked at him lovingly. Smiling himself, he brought our faces together as we meet in for a long-awaited kiss, now that Jesse has been proclaimed the hero of our town.

Standing up and got me out of my ropes on my hands, I instantly held his face in my hands as I treaded my fingers through his wet beard and lightly scratch it. Standing on my toes, I kissed him again and again, relishing onto the rough texture of his beard around his lips as I smiled and couldn’t help but to cry now that we’re together again.

Hearing the creaking doors opened, I pulled away from Jesse as I looked and saw the townsfolk coming out of their stores, and peered around to see if the coast was clear. Once they saw Callous Conrad’s dead body under the crushed water tank, a collection of gasps sounded as reality sank into their minds now that Deadlock has been vanquished.

“He did it… McCree beat Deadlock,” one of the townsfolk said, as he stepped out from his home and approached the scene carefully, trudging through the water as he got a closer look of the body. “McCree beat Deadlock!” he repeated once more, his hands raised up in celebration as others started to come out and a round of applause and whistles sounded from them, as they closed in on us.

Looking around, it was strange to be celebrated when they all turned their backs on Jesse before just because he was Deadlock. Of course, I would expect this town to kiss up whoever managed to bring peace again, but nonetheless Deadlock finally gotten their justice.

Jesse smiled, as he looked around him, people finally accepting him for being an outcast all of his life in town. Seeing them cheer for him, claiming him to be their local hero and pats of encouragement on his back as he indulges himself with the long-waited attention. He then looked down on me, the same genuine smile still on his face as he brought our faces together into a kiss and the cheers became louder and I couldn’t help but to laugh, a huge burden off my shoulders now that there is peace once more.

Almost like a dream, or in heaven.


	10. Chapter 10

It was all a blur from then on.

Word had gone out that Deadlock was gone, and a swarm of travellers and reporters from other towns came in to cover the story of how Jesse McCree had vanquished Deadlock singlehandedly. Not used to the sudden attention, Jesse left it all to the sheriff in which he had obliged happily.

The people of Little Rock was now free to roam back into town, and some even moved back into town to start their business once more. The quiet town was now bustling peacefully, each day something to look forward to now that there’s no trouble brewing around the corner of the alleyway.

Terry had also moved back into town, and gotten himself a special someone, too. Some boy (to Jesse’s shock) he met when he wanted his radiator fixed. Joe had stayed back at Little Rock, keeping his little business running with his little trinkets laying around for any traveller to buy from him.

Jesse, being the celebrity he is around town, made it a point to not invade his personal space and ask him nicely if anyone wanted a picture, or would outright ignore anyone if I happen to be with him that day as he paid his full attention on me, in which I had blushed madly about.

We also got married properly, at town hall with a white wedding and all. My mother cried tears of happiness, unlike the day when I was first swept away by Jesse. Joe did the honours of walking me down the aisle, and I couldn’t help but to think back of my late father. Would he be proud of me now that he has gotten what he wanted all along? Tears were fought back that day as I convinced myself to live on my new life with Jesse.

Jesse couldn’t stop praising me on how beautiful I looked on our wedding day. Gushing to the sheriff how lucky he was to have me as his wife as I lightly hit him on the shoulder and told him to stop before I could die out of embarrassment.

And seeing Jesse cleaned up nicely made me double take a look at him, his hair was brushed to the side neatly and his beard was also trimmed, I almost didn’t recognize him without him looking gruff. The suit he wore was flattering; he had to rent it from the wedding parlour in town in which I am glad he took the initiative for that.

Exchanging our oaths together, it was official that we are now legally married. Who knew that I would be happily married with the love of my life, the one that would change everything about himself for me, the one and only Jesse McCree.

After the bouquet toss, Jesse helped me up on Webster like old times, as he climbed on as well and waved one last time to the guests and crowd at town. Whipping the reigns of Webster, it started moving as we make our way back to our home.

“This feels familiar, déjà vu almost?” Jesse then quipped as I threw my head back and laughed from his statement. “Are you implying that the things happened last month didn’t just happen?” I craned my neck, taking a better look at him with a smug smirk plastered on his face. “Wish I could change those times, sweetheart—but what matters now is that you’re mine as I am yours,” he leaned down and gave me a chaste kiss as I smiled against his lips.

“Let’s go home, darling.”

Reaching back to our little cottage on top of the hill, in what had been I saw as my captivity resort is now my new home, one that I get to share with Jesse. Of newlyweds tradition, Jesse carried me over the threshold like we did before only this time, I wasn’t trying to get out of his grasp.

Putting me down in the living room, I couldn’t help but embrace him lovingly as I take in his scent that I have grown to love so much. Jesse tucked my head beneath his chin as he wrapped his arms around me, leaving no space between us.

Turning on the record player, a slow Western tune started playing, the light strums of a banjo accompanied by soft whistling. Pulling away from him, I placed his hand on the side of my waist as I held his other hand, and looked up to him to beckon for a dance together. Getting my message, he started swaying side to side as I followed him to dance. Leaning forward, I nestled myself in his chest as we continued dancing together until the song had ended.

* * *

 

That night, it was something I had to face head on, and my mother’s been asking for grandchildren all the time whenever we would meet, I think it’s time to make her a grandmother.

Jesse was on the bed, reading a book he gotten as a wedding gift from Joe, as I made my way to the bathroom to change into something more provocative that Jesse just couldn’t say no to. The ladies in the wedding parlour had been extremely helpful with the choice of lingerie that I would be comfortable in, and it was kept a secret from Jesse as I wanted to surprise him, to let him know that I want him, finally.

Looking at my reflection in the mirror, I became shy suddenly from the exposing sheer fabric that barely covered anything of my body. I began having second thoughts about what I was going to have with him because I know damn well that I might trigger a few flashbacks like the last time we tried to do this.

Placing both of my hands on the sink as I leaned forward, I took a deep breath and let it out, looking up at the mirror and face my reflection. “You can do this,” I told myself, encouraging myself that it was now or never this time and besides, mother can’t stop bugging us about grandchildren.

After I had calmed myself down, and stepped outside the bathroom, I could feel the tremors beneath my feet as I started climbing up the stairs to our shared bedroom. Thankfully, Jesse didn’t even noticed me coming up, still engorged with his reading until I was finally up close with him. Slightly clearing my throat, he turned his head to me and widened his eyes at how I was dressed.

Keeping my hands behind my back, I let his gaze wandered on me a little more and I even lifted my head up proudly, craning my neck even to let him see the exposed skin around my décolletage that was only framed with his previous wedding gift, the ruby pendant. I was also donning the white rose hair comb from on my hair—all mirroring the day of our wedding night, only this time I would let him have his way with me.

“What do you think?” I asked bravely, mentally cheering inside for not stuttering it out and turning my body from either side, showing him more off the little ensemble I had boldly decided on. But Jesse just stared at me with his mouth wide open, as if he still hasn’t taking in the view yet. “Jesse?” I called, and that seemed to snap him out of his thoughts before he put down his book and stood up, approaching me as he did.

“Darlin’, I… I don’t want you to hurt again,” he said sadly, taking my hands in his and held it up to his chest. “I know, Jesse—I’m sure you won’t hurt me again, too but—“ I stopped in my words as I blinked thoughtlessly about the decision I was going to make. “I want this, Jesse—and I want to do it _with you_ ,” I assured him, placing a hand on his cheek as he slowly sinks into it.

“I feel the same way, too, sugarcube but—“ I stopped him from continuing with a finger on his lips, not letting him finish. “Just make an honest woman out me, Jesse,” I just said to him and brought our bodies closer, and thankfully enough Jesse finally obliged to my advances.

Smiling against my finger, his omnic hand took my hand and started kissing my knuckles slowly, followed by the callouses in between my fingers and down to my wrist. My whole being shivered from the tickling sensation of his beard grazing the skin of my hand, as he kissed down my arm and I couldn’t help but to supress a small moan coming out from my lips.

His real hand treaded down on my sides, taking in every curve of my body as he rested upon my hip, rubbing slow circles and lightly feeling the soft material of my ensemble. Once his kisses has reached my shoulder, I craned my neck in his direction as our faces are directly in front of each other, our eyes locked in place and our lips merely inches away until we both closed in our distance together in for a kiss.

Wrapping an arm around his neck to deepen our kiss, Jesse bent down a bit to sweep me off my feet and carry me down to the bed gently, not breaking our kiss once even for air. I let my hands unbutton his flannel shirt, shedding it off from him as he does the same to my bra. We pulled away from each other momentarily for us to remove any article of clothing we have on at each other until we are completely bare, shamelessly appreciating each other.

“You’re as gorgeous as I could remember, darling,” Jesse complimented as he left open mouth kisses down my neck, as I held his hand and guided it to one of my breasts and I squirmed slightly from the light grazing from his beard on my torso. As he lightly fondled my breast, I did the pleasure of moving my hand around his chest, feeling his muscles around my fingers as I felt his body tensed against my touch in which I let out a light giggle from his reactions.

“I never had the chance to appreciate your body, Jesse,” I said as I ran my fingers through his springy body hair as he chuckled at me and he grinded his hardened length on my thighs as I moaned from the stiffness of him.

“We’ve got all night to appreciate each other, angel,” he continued with his kisses down my body as he let himself savour the feeling of my bountiful flesh against his hand, arching my back slightly from his caress. Once his mouth reached my navel, he kissed it gently and looked up at me as I smiled at him.

“Ready to make your momma’s wish come true?” he quirkily asked me and I couldn’t help myself but to chuckle at him. “Let’s not visit her until we’re sure that I’m pregnant,” I said cheekily and Jesse seemed to agree before he continued kissing every inch of my skin below me.

Then he started teasing, he kisses my inner thighs and when he’s dangerously close to where I wanted him the most, he would just drag himself away from it and I whined when I felt the sensation slowly building up from his playful kisses. When he finally did put his mouth against my mound, I let out a loud moan, finally getting what I really wanted from him.

He started lapping his tongue against my core as I folded my knees up to let him have a deeper taste of me. Placing both of my hands on his head to push himself further into me as I let out my moans of pleasure from his dancing tongue inside of me, I never gotten to appreciate this part during that night but now I just want to indulge myself into the sensation.

He kept going at it as I felt my peak rising, and Jesse worked his miraculous tongue even more with the help of his hand, thumbing my bundle of nerves to keep me on my toes until I had finally reached my orgasm, and Jesse oh so helpfully letting me ride it until I had come down from my high.

Emerging from between my legs, Jesse looked at me with his boyish smile, completely coated in my essence as I let out a shaky laugh, still distraught from my release. He loomed back over me and kissed me passionately, savouring the taste of myself as our tongues fought for dominance until I eventually let him devour me.

“I want you, Jesse,” I said in between our kisses, our hands roamed our respected bodies as we felt our skin against each other’s touch. “I’ll be gentle, sweetheart—don’t you worry,” he assured me and I gave him a nod for letting him to advance. Leaning back a bit, he wrapped his hand around his length and started to slick himself from the remainings of my release between my legs as I started panting from the feeling of having him so close to me.

I felt the fear again—from the times that happened that night and also the time where we tried to attempt this again back in my mother’s home, I felt my body quaked as I reminisce the feeling of him inside of me. Hitching my breath, I pushed away those thoughts—and instead replacing them with the hopes of consummating our relationship so that at least mother would get what she wants.

“You ready?” I didn’t pay attention when he asked that, only to respond when he called my name and I didn’t mean to make him worry when he suddenly retracted his length away from me but I managed to pull him close again with my hand on his back. “Yes, Jesse—please, I need you,” I said breathlessly and assured him that I was going to be fine, no matter how scared I was.

“Tell me to stop anytime, I won’t say no,” he gave me a chaste kiss before he repositioned himself against me as I closed my eyes, bracing for the impact and counted the seconds in my head, waiting for him to get a move on with it. When I felt his girth inserting in me, I clenched my jaws together and scratched my nails against his back as we both groaned, taking in the slight sting together as we tried to repose ourselves.

“You alright?” he had asked through short pants, and I couldn’t find my voice so I just nodded at him. “Just tell me when I could move, sweetheart—you can take your time,” he gently assured me and I couldn’t help but to smile. It was a drastic change from our first time together, and I much appreciate him for that to be so caring of me. After a few minutes of calming myself down as Jesse patiently waited for me, I told him that he could move now and that he had earned it.

“Remember to stop me if I get too rough now,” he reminded me as he placed his elbows on the sides of my face and kissed me and I instantly wrapped my arms around his shoulders as we both braced for each other. Feeling himself move against me was harsh at first, before I felt myself engulfing his length more and it started to feel good for the both of us.

“Harder,” I whispered silently into his ear as he slowly picked up his pace until he guessed how comfortable I was, but it wasn’t enough—not to me at least. “ _Harder_ ,” I urged again, but Jesse gave me a worried look as if he was too scared for his own good to take me more than he would offer. “It’s okay—just go harder,” I assured him as I brought our lips together again and he obliged by smacking against me faster.

Grunts and mewls filled the air as we both enjoy the sensation between our linkage together until Jesse fasten his pace instead, and I could feel my peak slowly building as I wrapped my legs around his waist urging him to become one with me. “I-I’m close,” I managed to pant out, as I felt more out of my mind as Jesse let out a supressed growl from his throat. “M-Me too,” he replied, keeping up with his pace as I had finally started seeing stars again, sensing my peak close.

“J-Jesse, I’m gonna come!” I pulled him tigther against me, clenching my eyes closed as I felt myself starting to break. “Together now—you and me!” Jesse had growled as I threw my head back to give room for the rush that went through my body straight to my core and shouted out Jesse’s name as I felt a foreign heat in between my legs with my name leaving Jesse’s lips in a loud shout, it could wake the neighbours if we had some.

It felt godlike, this pleasure that I have the privilege to share with Jesse. Tears seeped through my lids, falling down my cheeks as I gleefully embrace the sensation of coming together as one, both of us telling ‘I love you’ non-stop to each other as we gush about how we complete ourselves. Jesse slowly pulled out of me as I couldn’t help but to indulge the feeling when the hot liquid between my legs pouring out of me.

“You did so well, darlin’— _my perfect darlin’,”_ Jesse continued to kiss every perimeter of my face and I couldn’t help but to smile from his affectionate behaviour. We both then help each other to clean up after ourselves in which Jesse has been so kind to carry me downstairs and even clean after myself because I only complained that I was being a bit sore.

Changing the sheets, we finally managed to get into bed after being restless for the whole day. Jesse held me close, our limbs tangling with each other as we listened to each other’s heartbeats in sync and not talking but still comfortable with each other’s presence as we huddled close together under the covers.

“Got any baby names in mind?” Jesse suddenly quipped and I looked at him, finding his loving gaze upon me as I gave him a smile. “A few—but I couldn’t choose of course,” I replied as I nuzzled against his chest and felt him vibrate slightly when he chuckled.

“That just means we’re going to have a lot of kids, sweetheart,” Jesse teased coyly as he kissed the top of my head. “I don’t mind but let’s settle one for now,” I agreed, as the thought of having little multiple versions of Jesse and I run around the house as we tirelessly keep up with them.

“Boy or girl?”

“Girl, maybe,”

“Okay, how about Denise?” Jesse suggested.

“I was thinking Gabrielle,”

“… Then Danielle?” Jesse suggested more as I didn’t held back my chuckle when he just mashed those two names together.

“I love it,” I looked up at him as he reached down for a chaste kiss.

“How about boy, huh? I wouldn’t mind having a little runt like me,” Jesse then asked as I kept silent as I went through my thoughts about my ideal names for sons.

“I like Jeremy,”

“Then Jeremiah it is, then,”

“Really, _another_ cowboy?” I cocked my eyebrow at him but he just guffawed from his statement.

“Someone’s gotta keep the tradition going, sweetheart.”

We kept going on at each other about whether naming our first son either Jeremiah or Jeremy until we tire ourselves together and before we realized it, we went into a stupor slumber being in each other’s embrace.

* * *

 

When I had realized I had woken up, I wanted to close my eyes back and go back to sleep—being so comfortable in Jesse’s hold that I didn’t want to ruin.

Of course, I stayed there until I felt queasy, a new feeling that I was startled myself. Ruling out gastric attack was the first thing I did because I wasn’t hungry yet that morning, and then I ruled out pre-menstrual cramps because this was not like when I had those days, speaking of which…

When’s the last time I kept track of my period?

Before I tried to remember, the queasiness became more hard to ignore as I tried to keep quiet, clamping my mouth close with my hand as I carefully slip out of Jesse’s embrace and stumbled my way downstairs to the toilet where I let out all of the contents I had before last night in my stomach.

After relieving myself, I began to be more confused from where I was standing because as far as I know, fertilisation does not happen overnight and I had paid close attention to that in class for that one so I should be aware. Rinsing my mouth from any vomit taste, I immediately thought back of my last period but I lost track of time with so many things happening at the same time.

Instantly looking for the calendar in the living room, I traced back a few weeks ago in which I tried to remember when I had it last before my fingers stopped at where the date Jesse had taken me to be his wife. That was three weeks ago, and a few days after—he didn’t bother to wear protection that time and if I did the math right, I should be pregnant.

_Pregnant!_

Clamping my mouth together, I couldn’t help but feeling a cluster of emotions going through me at the same time, I hadn’t realized that I started crying as well. I felt happy and excited, because I could finally give Jesse what he wanted and not to mention having our little own to call our bundle of joy but at the same time, I feel terrified and also worried because what if Jesse starts to get second thoughts on finally having a family together? I couldn’t help but to think that he would suddenly think that he couldn’t handle this, so he’s going to pick up his bags and leave.

 _No,_ I had thought. In my mother’s words, I need to trust him especially in this kind of times.

How am I going to tell him? I can’t just drop the bomb on him the moment he wakes up, and I don’t have a pregnancy test to prove that I am (this I need to confirm myself later, but I probably am most likely pregnant). Heading my way to sit down on the couch, my leg kicked on the basket of knitting yarn, the unfinished scarf laid on top of it as I stared a hole into it until I got the better idea of what I was going to do to tell Jesse.

Hauling the basket beside me and sat on the couch, I immediately started to get to work and glanced at the wall clock to see how much time I guessed Jesse would finally wake up, which probably gives me a spare hour and a half, two if I’m lucky enough.

* * *

 

But about four hours later, I surprise myself for how long Jesse had slept in. I even had the spare time to prepare for the both of us and I had to go upstairs and fetch him myself as I had prepared the surprise I hid downstairs readily.

Slowly creaking upstairs, Jesse was still soundlessly asleep with all of his limbs thrown around the bed without a care I couldn’t help but to smile at the sight. Sitting close to him, I slipped my hand in his as I light shook it and called out for him. “Honey, wake up,” I said, barely a whisper when I leaned myself on him, my mouth close to his ear as he started to move groggily and mutter something incoherent.

“Jesse, come on—it’s almost noon,” I coaxed again and that seemed to at least get his attention when he fluttered his eyes open and stretched himself on bed accompanied by a loud yawn as I couldn’t help but to scrunch my nose from the morning breath that hit me. “Good morning, sweetheart,” Jesse greeted as he held the back of my neck with a hand and smiled at me sleepily.

“You’ve been out for too long, I was starting to miss you there, partner,” I playfully say as I climbed into bed with him, feeling his warmth against me and how good he smelled. “Didn’t mean to make you wait, sweetheart—just didn’t have a great sleep like that for decades,” Jesse assured.

Ever since his victory against Deadlock, he would get either a good night’s rest or no sleep at all and sometimes he would wake up in the middle of the night worrying himself that Deadlock would come back and get me even though I had assured him many times that he saved me from them.

“You like your dreams more than me?” I frowned at him, turning myself away from him but his robotic hand pulled me back closer. “My dreams are nothing compared to you,” he reached down and placed a kiss on my forehead and I laughed from his statement.

“Come on, breakfast is done,” I got up out of bed and pulled his hand, as he reluctantly left his comfortable position before he trudged behind me as we both made our way to the dining table to have our first breakfast together.

“Here,” I gave him a neatly folded piece of knitted yarn, as I couldn’t ignore the fast beating of my heart on how we would react to this. “Aww, sweetheart—you didn’t have to,” Jesse placed his real hand on top of it and gently felt the soft material against his fingers but I chuckled at him.

“You’re the one that asks me to knit one for you—and you’ve been oh so nice to me, so I thought why not,” I shrugged and kept my hands behind me, twiddling my fingers behind me impatiently for him to unfold it.

“I love you so much, you know that? You never fail to make me tell you that  each time you do something for me,” Jesse complimented as he started unfolding the scarf and I bit down my lip to keep myself from smiling like a school girl when their crush had accepted their love letter full of personal feelings.

Once he completely unravels the scarf and something fell down on the floor, Jesse first draped the scarf around his shoulders and bent down first, grunted a bit and picked up the pair of mittens that looked even smaller when he holds it. “Is this a part of the gift, too? Seems to be a bit small for me, sweetheart—unless it’s for my gun,” Jesse inspected one of the mittens by holding up one of the pair.

“Thing looks like it could only fit a baby, and—“ Jesse stopped in his words, as a wave of relief finally rushed through me when Jesse had _finally_ gotten the message what the mitten was for. “Baby? Sweetheart, are you—“

 “Yes!” I couldn’t help but to cry out and clamped my mouth close as tears of joy fell down, happy to announce that I was expecting.

“W-Was it from last night? That was quick!” Jesse ran a hand through his hair and ran his fingers on the soft mittens in his hand. “Actually, it’s from three weeks ago—ring any bells?” I raised my eyebrows at him as he thought to himself until his expression fell.

“ _Oh_ ,” he only said and his look was now replaced with a sullen look. “Sweetheart—I’m sorry, I—“ “I told you time and time again, Jesse—it’s fine, and look what it’s gotten to us now,” I interrupted him and took his hands into my own, feeling the comforting material of the mitten I had knitted in a rush earlier this morning.

“All mistakes aside, we finally gotten what we had actually want, _a baby_ ,” I emphasized and kept my gaze at him, before he enveloped me into a hug in which I graciously returned before I pulled away and closed our distance for a kiss together.

“A-Are you keeping it?” Jesse asked me uncertainly and I furrowed my eyebrows at him. “If I don’t, I don’t think mother would allow me back home,” I jokingly said and at least that managed to at least make Jesse slightly chuckle before he placed his hands on my hips and lifted me up in the air and twirled me around as his contagious laugh rang out in which I happily laughed along.

“You’re pregnant, I can’t believe my ears!” he cried out as he put me down and embraced me back as I nuzzled close into his chest.

“I love you, Jesse McCree,” I said, closing my eyes and ready myself for another brand new experience coming for me for the next nine months, and I have Jesse right by my side to share it with.

“And I love you, Lady McCree.”


	11. Epilogue

The familiar feeling of the tall grass that grazes my legs as I step through the meadow never fails me to make me feel like the world is mine. Relishing the feel of the grass against my fingers as I made through the middle of the prairie, the breeze that I had missed so much blowing my dress and hair in the wind.

It has been far, too long since I was last here, and here I am, finally where I wanted to be again. Thinking back of the dandelion wish I made when the last time I was here, I smiled to myself how long has time passed since that day and I couldn’t believe how many things has changed since that day.

“Mummy!” the melodious tone sounded from my daughter called behind me as I turned around, and saw my little girl, now ten years old, trotting her way daintily towards me with a picnic basket in hand as I crouched down to her level and she stopped in her tracks.

I see a lot of myself in her, she looked like how I was when I was younger and I had the pictures to prove it, too—and monkey see, monkey do, she also enjoys it when she follows my etiquette teaching I like to bring her along sometimes whenever I’m town giving classes.

“Let’s set up the picnic, okay Danielle?” I took the basket from her and handed her the picnic mat as she nodded at me with a cheeky grin on her face, the familiar white roses sparkling in her hair when the sun shines on it before she went ahead and prepared the spot for the picnic.

“Bang!” a boyish sound rang out behind me as I turned around, and pretended to be shot down as I laid helplessly on the ground until little footsteps approached me and I couldn’t help but to smile until my little six-year-old whined.

“Momma, you’re supposed to be _dead_ , remember?” he crossed his arms and pouted adorably as I sat back up and pulled out his hat and brushed his hair.

“Do you actually want me dead, Jeremy?” I had asked teasingly and he widened his eyes at me. “Of course not, momma! If there’s anyone out there wanting to kill you, they better be on a watch out for Jeremiah the Fearless!” he had proudly posed with his hands on his hips and his chin held up high, it reminded so much of someone I love.

“Okay, cowboy—go help your sister,” I patted his back and he nodded before he went to his sister and held onto the other corners of the picnic mat. Seeing those two together, I couldn’t stay mad at them for too long whenever they act up, my little precious children. Mother was ecstatic when I first announced that I was expecting, she went her way to guide me on motherhood and what I should expect when I first started having odd cravings and not to mention the mood swings.

She became more overwhelmed when I was expecting again, and this time it was a _boy_ , something she never had the chance to care for. Mother had been such a great help through both of my pregnancies, never leaving my side whenever I’m home with her.

“Leaving it to the kids, you slacker,” a familiar Southern accent drawled behind me as I turned and smiled at its direction. Standing up, brushing the dirt off of my dress, Jesse McCree approached me with his signature smirk on his face, donning his cowboy apparel and all that I never seem to get enough of as he held another bundle of joy in his arms that was only just three months old.

It saddens me when mother couldn’t see the day where I had brought out my third child into the world. My mother had peacefully passed a year ago, due to old age but she smiled, still in death now that she could finally reunite with my late father, who is probably getting himself kicked everywhere he goes without my mother guiding him. At least I let her have the feeling of being a grandmother, and I could never repay the things she has lead me so much.

“They need to be independent, they’re not going to be kids forever you know,” I just said as I graciously accepted the baby when Jesse passed it to me and I had passed him the basket in exchange. “Isn’t that right, Flo?” I nuzzled my nose with the baby as he reacted and smiled from my loving gesture. “We’ve got the years, sweetheart—I’m going to make sure of that,” Jesse slung a hand around my waist as we walked together to the picnic mat in which Danielle and Jeremy started rolling around on.

When Jesse opened the basket to see what’s inside, he smiled to himself as he reached out a pastry, the very same kind I had gave to him upon our first meeting. “Like old times, sweetheart?” Jesse quipped as I set the paper plates and cups on the mat and smiled at him knowingly. “You know very well they’re your favourite, Jesse,” I replied, taking a bite out of the pastry when he had offered, before wolfing it down by himself.

After the kids and baby had been fed and put him into a nap, we let the kids play at the prairie—pretending to be a princess duelling with a cowboy as we watched from afar being in each other’s embrace just like old times. Turning to look at him, I brought my hand and scratched his beard, as he closed his eyes and enjoying the feel of it as I scratched where it was starting to grow grey hairs.

“You’re aging, old man,” I smirk playfully at him as Jesse chuckled from my comment. “But I still feel ten years younger when I’m with you, darlin’,” his metal hand cradled the back of my neck as we brought our faces together for a kiss and I smiled against his lips. Snuggling closer to him, I rested my head on the crook of his neck as he pulled off his hat and rested the side of his neck next to mine, feeling his hand fumbling with the ruby jewel around my neck in which I wear proudly everyday.

Ever since the passing of my mother, we moved back into the house considering the fact that now that our children have grown, they’re to be expected of having separate rooms, especially for our growing girl. It was surreal, on how much time has passed since our first pregnancy, and how fast my little ones are growing. In two years’ time, Danielle would be going to middle school and I couldn’t help but to worry about her making friends.

I tried to rub off my posh off of her, but she would rather wear traditional dresses than the more casual ones I have gave her to wear but so far, the kids at school never cared for what she wore and I couldn’t be even more proud when she’s becoming one of the promising students in class. So, I would just hope for the best when the time has come and would always be there for her whenever she faces what I did when I was younger.

Jeremy is so much like his father, always looking up to him and copy everything he does until I scolded him for biting down a finished creamsicle stick in his mouth like a cigar like Jesse always does outside the house and away from the kids.

That at least, he managed to listen and would just copy everything else that I told him he could do of his father. Boys also readily easy to make friends, no matter how different they maybe from each other so I wasn’t that worried when it came to him, but you would never know.

And Jesse couldn’t stop spoiling the children, always coming home with toys and gifts each time he went off on one of his hunts. Jesse decided himself on being a bounty hunter around for the town, taking in hunts for either people or menacing wild animals in any trail and that has brought us good money on the table. My heart drops every time he has to leave for a hunt, but each time I know he would always come back and hardly harmed from any of it, but there’s always a risk.

“Jesse,” I called to him as I pulled back and looked at him and he raised his eyebrows at me. Placing a hand on his rugged cheek, treading my fingers around his beard as he softly sinks into it and I brought our faces closer for a kiss, our lips slowly moving against each other as we deepened it with every inch closer as Jesse held my cheek to deepen it.

“Ew!” the chorus from Danielle and Jeremy sounded in front of us as we pulled back from each other and laughed together from the interruption of the kids.

“You little runts, get out of my property!” Jesse playfully roared as he got up from the mat and started charging towards the children as they squealed in excitement and started running for their lives as Jesse pretended to be the baddy of their little play as I watched and laughed to myself as I watched them play.

Life was good; I have three little angels (probably more, if I felt ready for one more) and a wonderful husband, who has changed my whole life, for the better and the worst and I would never change the past for it if I had gotten the chance.

Nothing would be able to beat this fulfilling achievement now that I have everything where I wanted in life, in which I would proudly be called as the Lady McCree.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pls don't come and find me for this terrible excuse of a story ahh

**Author's Note:**

> Check out the [remake](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18121457) for this one!


End file.
